Please tell me he didn’t buy a matching Lifesavers jacket!

Section 117, Row 23

I have a love-hate relationship with the Olympics. Love the Olympics, especially the Winter Games, because of the skating, skiing, ski-boarding, speed skating, hockey, ski jumping, luge, bobsled… basically all of it is a blast to watch. Speaking of skating, specifically ice dancing, it was fun to see a “Congrats Emily Samuelson & Evan Bates” banner hanging at the Ice Cube last weekend where I have my fitness class. It just happens to be their home ice.

Hate the Olympics because the TV networks drag out the viewing until midnight every night. I go to work bleary-eyed and looking perpetually hungover. Not a pretty sight.

It didn’t help that I came down with a cold the night of the Opening Ceremonies (which was awesome… those whales, the bear rising out of the floor, humongous maple leaves floating and flitting… very cool). I had a sore throat, fever, achy muscles, and, to my detriment, a loss of appetite. Slept most of Saturday. Reached for my water bottle on the nightstand around 10:30 p.m. and found it nearly empty. Decided to refill it. Felt myself blacking out as I stood at the kitchen sink. Twenty-five minutes later I woke up, flat on my back on the living room floor. Strange place to take forty winks, eh?

Turns out I had hit my head, although I didn’t know it until hours later. Given the tragic death of Natasha Richardson, I was keenly aware of the possibility yet felt zero pain in my head or neck. Is that usually the case? I stayed awake for a few hours, eating to raise my blood sugar, watched some of the Olympics rebroadcast of the day’s events, then went back to bed. Later that morning I could feel the spot where my forehead had impacted with… what? I guess I’ll never know. The good news is that I’m okay. No lasting effects. A teeny-tiny headache Sunday evening, but no nausea, confusion, or bruising (although my eyeglasses did get a bit mangled). Who knows. Maybe it knocked some sense into me. Meh. Not holding my breath on that one!

Sunday evening I was wondering if Hayden and that female appendage companion of his were still joined at the hip in Vancouver. Of course! Taking long walks in downtown Vancouver, being noticed and ignored by seemingly everybody, sampling the local dining, buying Olympics gear. (Could someone please explain to me why the Fashion Icon wears a gaudy Olympics-striped jacket that looks like a tent? I hope it was a gift.) It turns out they were also at that men’s hockey game I was watching on TV. Canada vs. USA. Well, I have to confess I wasn’t totally absorbed by it because I was in another genealogical zone, multi-tasking on my laptop. Yeah, they could have flashed Hayden’s mug on that screen multiple times and I would have been oblivious. But thanks to the gossip rags I learned that he was sitting in section 117, row 23.

OMGOSH!!! This is so freakin’ great! Hayden was in Section 117? Row 23? Are you pulling my leg?! Really? You would’t lie to me? Wow! Oh, wow, wow, wow!! Do you know what I can do with that information???

Absolutely. Nothing. Yeah, why is it important to know exactly where he sat his tushie? Beats me. Maybe it empowers the storyteller. I know something you previously did not know… so there!

Yippee.

I love the Olympics for the pageantry, personalities, triumphs, tragedies. Plenty of tragedy this time. The luger who died on a practice run. The speed skater who lost the gold because he was DQ’d based on following his coach’s instructions. Figure skater Joannie Rochette, whose mother died suddenly. Those are all very sad.

On a happier note, Rochette’s performance Tuesday night was mind-blowingly, scary good. Team Canada is finally racking up a few gold medals, which means I get to lustily belt out “O Canada” to a perplexed Darth Kitty. I was pleased with the University of Michigan contingent of ice dancers: Davis & White got silver, Samuelson & Bates were 11th but gained valuable experience and looked like they were enjoying the experience. Canadian pair Tessa Virtue & Scott Moir turned in a golden performance despite skating to that icky Mahler’s 5th Symphony. Yeah, I much preferred Davis & White’s “Phantom of the Opera” music.

So, is Hayden there for the long haul? Opening to closing? Could be. Hey, if you got the dough and the fame to land those primo venue tix, go for it! The closest I ever got to an Olympics was when my sister and I visited the Park City venue prior to the 2002 Salt Lake City Winter Olympics. I think I was there in February, around this time of year, and they didn’t have much snow either. We planned on going down the bobsled run, which was open to the public, but all the slots were filled by the time we got there. Instead we got to watch other people having fun. Not that they were zipping down those twists and turns. Snail-paced bobsledding was more like it.

Probably just as well. A few days before leaving for SLC I twisted some vertebrae in my back. Extremely painful, but no way was I canceling that trip. Our ski excursion got nixed, though, which totally bummed me out. Yeah, I went to Park City and bought a really cool t-shirt that said, “SKI” but I didn’t actually get to, um… you know… ski.

[24 February 2010]

I {heart} you, Hayden!

Smelled A Rat

Is Hayden married yet? Yeah, I do feel sort of “out of it” these days. Don’t be fooled into thinking that I have just grown bored with The One (remind me again, what has he done lately?). No, no, no. I think of him frequently. Constantly. Despite my hiatus, musings have been rattling around in my head screaming to get out. I just haven’t had the time. Here’s my recent life in a nutshell: Four hospitalizations. Surgery. Holidays. Disaster averted. Mega mouse. Car problems. Wardrobe malfunction. Avatar 3-D! Suicide attempt. Long lost relative found. Baby bump rumors quashed.

’Kay, that last one was about Blanche & His Dreaminess, not me. Added it to the heap in case the other stuff made you yawn. When last we conversed — around Thanksgiving — I was coping with the hospitalizations of not one, not two, but four relatives: three cousins and my grandma. All for unrelated causes. One cousin had a potentially fatal infection that baffled doctors until they realized it was tooth-related. He later joked that the nurses became more attractive once they removed their masks (they feared Ebola or something). Last month, another cousin attempted suicide (overdose). He’s doing okay. Yeah, it’s been a helluva few weeks.

Fortunately, Grandma’s diagnosis of colon cancer could be solved surgically (note: when Doc strongly suggests a sigmoidoscopy, take him up on it… just sayin’). Yet, it was high risk due to her cheesecloth-y lungs. Being a plucky gal, Grandma opted to “go for it.” Her remarkable will to live enabled her to sail through surgery and be weaned from the ventilator within hours. Still, it was no walk in the park, peeps.

Needless to say, Christmas cards, gift buying and wrapping all became just-in-time operations. Even my Christmas tree was erected on Christmas morning. Later, we learned that airplane and body parts nearly rained down upon my family’s celebration, courtesy of the Fruit of the Kaboom bomber. Relief was short-lived when it dawned upon me that Mr. Underpants would be incarcerated less than 2 miles (3.2 km) from my house (at the local federal detention center). Egad! Suddenly, Michigan has become a terrorist magnet. Was this man testing Detroit Metro Airport’s security response?

Before New Year’s Day, while in the basement to check an electrical breaker, I discovered a rat-sized mouse. Freshly dead, I might add. Body, sans tail, was a gargantuan six inches (15 cm) long. Godzilla mouse. Due to frigid temps, the pulley system on my car’s electric window decided to bind up. Two weeks ago the zipper on my winter boots “malfunctioned.” It seemed the perfect opportunity to obtain my long-coveted UGG boots, but no dice. Went with “Plan B” instead. The replacement pair lacks UGG stylishness but is super warm.

Went to see Avatar in 3-D. It was beyond cool, but you already knew that, right? A publicity poster for Takers hung in the theater lobby. Studying it, I had difficulty making the guy on the left look like Hayden… probably because Hayden was the guy in the center. Sheesh, I didn’t immediately recognize the love of my life! Am I pathetic or what?

And that finally brings us to genealogy. Family stuff. I used my Christmas gift money to buy a subscription to Ancestry.com and upgrade my genealogy software. Happily, it led me to a discovery: the obituary for my great-great grandpa, a coal miner last known to reside in Johnstown, Pa. As it turns out, that’s where he died and was buried. To keep myself occupied between Super Bowl commercials last Sunday, I researched Blanche’s family. I would have researched Hayden’s family but I know virtually nothing about his ancestors, save for his maternal grandmother. Blanche’s family, however, has been in Hollywood for generations, which gave me something to work with. I discovered that the marriage date (divorce date?) for her parents on IMDb.com is wrong. Apparently the Bilson men trade their wives in for younger models after a time. Just an observation. Hey, it’s the Hollywood way.

So, it was kind of ironic that Google recently alerted me to rumors of a baby bump of the Christensen-Blanche variety. Interesting. Except Blanche’s rep swiftly denied it. Dang, and I had such a nice start on Baby Christensen’s maternal pedigree. Guess it’ll have to be shelved for a while.

Well, the opening ceremony of the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, British Columbia is tonight. I am rooting for four ice dancers with Ann Arbor ties: Meryl Davis & Charlie White, Emily Samuelson & Evan Bates. Most likely, Hayden is rooting for a gold medal for the Canadian hockey teams (men’s and women’s). The men are managed and coached by former Detroit Red Wing Steve Yzerman and Wings coach Mike Babcock. Going to an Olympics is one of the items on my Bucket List. Speaking of medals, I really like the ones for this Olympics, made from reclaimed precious metals gleaned from consumer electronics. Geeky cool.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

[12 February 2010]