Scroll and quill"Ghosts and Shadows" quotes, Sessions 70-79Scroll and quill

Session 70

"You can't tell that (Mandor) is lying." -- GM
"It's Mandor, I just assume he is." -- Melanie

"Oh, you used (Abigail). That's all right, then." -- Archi to Ragnar

"Don't you think marching with 20 men into an army of 20,000 is a little unwise?" -- Laughter
"Would you rather we sat here and waited for Finndo to come to us?" -- Archi
"No, but what's wrong with assassination?" -- Laughter

"If I have to staple your chest back together, I'm going to be very irritated." -- Laughter to Archi

"Well, this time I am transgressing into (the Wyr's) pack area, so I kill them like I kill everything else." -- Ragnar to GM

"I look like I might snap at any minute and kill all of you, or just go unconscious." -- Killian to GM, Claudio and Archi

Session 71

"Alas, my days of buggering boys are over." -- Random to Ulysses

"Mental note: next time I see Caine, shapeshift away my anal sphincter." -- Ragnar to GM

"Underwater, no one can see you drool." -- Jason to the group

"In the beginning was the word, and the word was 'wubba!'" -- Jason to the group

"Archimedes, you have eight legs." -- GM to Archi
"Hey, it's Arachnimedes!" -- Dann

"In Rebma, we allow the men to go through the door first." -- Cordelia to Killian
"I pick her up and throw her through the door." -- Killian to GM

"What, you mean none of my people skills rubbed off on (Killian) with my soul?" -- Archi to GM
"So that's where you keep them!" -- Dann

Session 72

"I don't want to deal with your wife if you get killed." -- Kaedric to Archi

"Sarcasm and contraception." -- Jason
"That's what it takes to become a civilized man?" -- GM

"If (Killian and I) ever get our souls untwined, he's going to kill me." -- Archi to GM

"You are Archi's son." -- Ulysses
"Yes, that was decided long ago, at my conception." -- Dakota

"What is pizza?" -- Dakota
"Kind of like a big, edible quarter." -- Ulysses

"I can perform for you the function that Abigail used to perform for you. The one I knew of her performing, at any rate. Anything else costs extra." -- Ragnar to Finndo

"I have good news and bad news." -- Ulysses
"The bad news?" -- Benedict
"Well, I don't know how to put this, but your daughter looks like she's been beaten silly." -- Ulysses
"And the good news?" -- Benedict
"You're about to become a grandfather." -- Ulysses

"What do you do when a pregnant woman comes beating at your door?" -- Dann
"Send her flowers?" -- Dan

"Finndo's the Head of House Halybard." -- Laughter
"And how long have you known this?" -- Archi
"Since I went to the bathroom." -- Laughter

"You are not to lure dangerous animals into the city-limits from beyond the pressure barrier." -- Cordelia to Killian
"Especially not using Rebmans as a lure." -- Kris

Session 73

"Here's your breakfast." -- Laughter
"Great, what did Archimedes do this time?" -- Ulysses
"I don't know. You can have it after you fix him. I mean save him." -- Laughter

"With unconsciousness comes clarity?" -- Archi to Corwin
"How many times have you seen the Unicorn?" -- Ulysses

"May we still ambush you?" -- Corwin
"If you feel the need." -- Archi

"Whatever you're going to do, I'm sure it's stupid, so don't." -- Sky to Claudio

"Ah-ha. My work is not so difficult as I thought. (Killian) does not think he's a dog." -- Cordelia to herself

"Do you know Ulysses can't be hurt?" -- Shade
"I crushed his skull, and he kept talking. That was annoying." -- Dan

"I think it would be politically inexpedient for me to lure the Crown Prince of Amber to Ixaxis so you can beat him up." -- Kaedric to Claudio

"Are you going to take that from Gérard?" -- Dan
"From Gérard? Hell, yes!" -- Shade

"You know the greatest thing about being a living Trump? I don't have to wait an hour after eating before I go in the water." -- Ulysses to the group

Session 74

"Ulysses goes back to his room and crosses 'Unicorn' off his list of people to do." -- Dann to GM, after Ulysses sleeps with the Unicorn

Session 75

"This happens only once every 7,000 years." -- the Unicorn, referring to sleeping with a human
"For you, maybe." -- Ulysses

"There is one thing, about tomorrow..." -- the Unicorn
"I don't have to wear some stupid outfit, do I?" -- Ulysses

"Well, at least I won't have to tie your hooves down." -- Ulysses to the Unicorn

"You were drinking at 10 a.m.?" -- Jason
"I just had sex with the Unicorn." -- Dann
"Go to Disneyland!" -- Jason

"Are you a cousin?" -- Mok
"No, I'm an exiled war criminal. Don't sweat it." -- Ragnar

"Am I dead?" -- Mok
"No, not yet. But you could be...soon" -- Claudio

"Hey, Uncle Benny." -- Ulysses to Benedict
"Screwing the Unicorn's made you cocky." -- Kris
"Foreplay with the Unicorn made me cocky." -- Dann

"Archimedes is the Crown Prince, so you tend not to ignore what he tells you to do." -- Ulysses
"Which is what Claudio did." -- Mok
"Right, which is why Claudio is playing by himself in his room." -- Ulysses

"Breakfast (in Amber) is, like, 6-9." -- Ulysses to Mok

"Ulysses, Hamburgler Prince of Amber." -- Jason
"Robble, robble, baby." -- Dann

Session 76

"I'll try and learn something (from fighting with Gérard)." -- Killian to GM

"Chicks are cool when they don't talk." -- Ulysses to GM

"And now we'll begin on the sparkling wines." -- Cordelia
"I try to look like I'm not about to smash something." -- Killian

"You're kind of disturbed by the face Ulysses is wearing at lunch. He's almost glowing." -- GM to Archi
"He must be pregnant." -- Jason

"This is not my doing." -- Claudio
"I love conversations that begin with that preface." -- Random

"Is my arm OK?" -- Ragnar
"No. It's blistering." -- GM
"Cool. Is it spreading?" -- Ragnar
"Yes." -- GM
"Unfortunate." -- Ragnar

"So, either (Sand) poisoned you, or she rescued you." -- Dan
"Or both." -- Jason and Kris

"Now, let me get this straight. You were insolent to someone of a higher rank than you, and now you want an apology. This is still an absolute monarchy. I don't know if you've noticed." -- Sky to Claudio

"I wonder what else I'm not the best at?" -- Mok to Caitlin

"If (Cordelia) seems amenable, I'll kiss her." -- Killian
"Describe amenable." -- GM

"This is so undignified. A Chaosite mercenary comes to Amber, and his mom has to show up and bail him out." -- Ragnar to Cassandra

"You were more fun to play with when I was an infant." -- Ragnar to Cassandra

"They say I have to go to sleep, now. Want to help?" -- Ragnar to Sand

"Kaedric says Council meetings never happen." -- Claudio
"Kaedric also said the Serpent never shows up at weddings." -- Sky
"Yes, I'm beginning to wonder if Kaedric knows anything." -- Claudio
"I think he just lies a lot." -- Sky

"Swayvill almost never calls Council meetings. But perhaps that will change when I am king. Just to annoy you." -- Kaedric to Claudio

"I don't think I should make contact with the horse's mind." -- Mok to Caitlin

"Chaosites in Amber. That hardly ever happens." -- Random to Ragnar

Session 77

"What does Ulysses want?" -- Killian to Archi
"Sex." -- Kris

"I hope I didn't interrupt any important experiment that will blow up the house." -- Claudio
"I don't do chemicals." -- Ian

"I think Mok's main mission now is to avoid being done by Ulysses." -- Mok to the group

"Where is Kaedricways?" -- Caitlin
"Over the river and through the woods." -- GM

"Orrin is smiling facetiously." -- GM to Caitlin
"Isn't he always?" -- Kris

"Whenever you look at me that way, my scalp tingles." -- Orrin to Caitlin

"I'm not even capable of making something like this up. It's too complex!" -- Mok to Heather

"Are you one of the people I know?" -- Mok
"I might be. Who sent you?" -- Laughter

"Do you have Ulysses' Trump?" -- Mok
"No." -- Laughter
"Why are you lying?" -- Mok
"Because I might need to feed him breakfast." -- Laughter

"The Trump bursts into flames in your hands." -- GM to Mok
"I think that one's broken." -- Mok to Laughter

"I was just thinking that the way those things bounce, you might hurt the kid." -- Mok to the very pregnant Laughter, about riding a horse

"I need to find something to kill (at the stable)." -- Killian
"Hey, don't look at me." -- Mok

"How long have you been traveling Shadow?" -- Archi
"I've done it once. It was easy." -- Mok

"You know, I get this sinking feeling that Laughter only showed up at the stable to watch me ride a horse." -- Mok to Killian and Sky

"Why are you covering your mouths?" -- Mok
"It's impolite to show your teeth." -- Sky
"And all along, I've been smiling at everyone." -- Mok

"Let me guess, you're a little hot." -- Archi
"Why thank you, I didn't know you thought of me that way." -- Ulysses

"I don't drink." -- Killian
"You've gotta drink something, or you'll shrivel up." -- Ragnar

"This is bad. I can't Trump back to my girlfriend. I think I'm going to get dumped." -- Mok to Ulysses

Session 78

"I rally my men. 'Let's go, guys.'" -- Claudio to GM

"No, (the King) is definitely dead. He's lying in state." -- Dakota
"Great!" -- Claudio, rather sarcastically
"I do not think this is great. I think this is bad." -- Dakota

"Are you evil?" -- Mok
"Why would I admit to that?" -- Ian
"That sounds like an evil answer." -- Mok

"My dad's the Crown Prince of Chaos. Who's your dad?" -- Ian
"Dead." -- Mok

"Are you as clueless as I am?" -- Mok
"No." -- Ian

"Do they eat bats in Chaos?" -- Mok
"They eat lots of things in Chaos." -- Ian
"I'm never going to Chaos." -- Mok

"The family tree is like a rose bramble." -- Dan
"Yeah, everyone is poking each other." -- Wendi

"No one ever asks Gérard his theories on Trump." -- Kris to the group

"Mok detects circular logic, but doesn't bring it up, since Gérard looks bigger than him." -- Mok to GM

"I don't want to go with (Killian). He hits me." -- Mok
"What makes you think I wouldn't?" -- Gérard

"There's a knock at the door. It's Sand." -- GM
"I tell her to stay away from the water, since we wouldn't want mud." -- Ulysses

"Apparently, Fiona knows a thing or two about magic." -- Mok to Ian

"Anything Fiona can't handle will kill you so fast that you can't even blink." -- Ragnar
"And?" -- Killian

"I'm guessing Finndo didn't do this." -- Claudio to Kaedric, after learning that Kaedric and Melanie are pregnant

"I'll softly inquire to the Abyss, not really in the direction of the Serpent...And if I see the Serpent coming, I'll try to run away." -- Claudio to GM

"I'm the great space pirate..." -- Kris, speaking for Archi
"Arrrrrchimedes." -- Dann

"I want to make this as short and painless as possible." -- Archi
"Then you're in the wrong castle." -- Ulysses

"And I recently lost consciousness." -- Killian
"And sometime soon you'll regain it." -- Ragnar

"Creepy little kid." -- Mok, referring to Ian

"To the laundry, gentlemen?" -- Ragnar to Killian and Mok

"What you need is for Laughter to have amnesia." -- Kris
"No, I just need for her to be confused." -- Dan

"Benedict left earlier this morning to find Fiona." -- Random to Archi
"I wish we knew that." -- Mok, Killian and Ragnar

"(Archi's) better with the Pattern then you are." -- GM
"We have him skip that part." -- Ulysses

"Please don't make me pregnant." -- Claudio to the Serpent

"What else do you say when the Serpent is sliding around you?" -- Shade
"I'd think of something." -- Jason

"I commit suicide on the spot. Gérard thought of something that never occurred to me." -- Ragnar to GM

Session 79

"Hey, maybe (Song) is a Jewel sword!" -- Kris
"Oh yeah, like I want that showing up in my pants." -- Wendi

"You know, even without his memories, (Archi's) still the same cold-hearted, arrogant prick. Not that I'd mind if he took your soul, because then I wouldn't have any excuse not to kill you." -- Claudio to Killian

"Is it all right if we be friends now?" -- Archi
"You're my dad. We can't be friends." -- Chance

"I like knee-jerk reactions. They're a lot of fun." -- Dan
"Yeah, seeing as how you have two knees and you're a jerk." -- Dann

"I have to become pumulous again. Unless that's a bad thing, in which case I don't want to." -- Ulysses to GM

"I need a favor. Well, actually, it's an order." -- Random
"It's only an order because you have a crown." -- Ulysses
"Yeah, and if you go to any Burger King in Shadow, you can have one too, although it won't do you much good." -- Random

"Humor is based off of false logic, and Laugher's full of it." -- Shade
"But you have to understand logic to know false logic." -- Dan

"You can't say stuff like that and expect me to understand." -- Laughter to Killian
"You can't say stuff like 'two' and expect (Laughter) to understand." -- Shade

"The way (Laughter) says things is so...odd." -- Killian to Archi

"How come no one ever told me that Caine wasn't dead?" -- Chris to the group

"How do I explain this? You're not sure." -- GM to Melanie

"Wow, you're a little bloodthirsty. Is that why I like you?" -- Archi
"I guess. I'm a genocide, if that helps." -- Laughter

"Laughter shuts the door in Ulysses' face." -- GM
"But this is my room." -- Ulysses

"Killian, do you do anything other than beat people up?" -- Mok
"I hunt." -- Killian

"Sorry, I exceeded my ten word limit." -- Mok to Killian

"Let's eat." -- Killian
"Let's just stop talking." -- Mok

"Brand's dead, isn't he?" -- Mok
"Yes." -- Killian
"That's good." -- Mok

"Don't talk to the castle, Mok. The last time you did that, you didn't like how it answered." -- Laughter
"This was in the future, right?" -- Mok

"Trump isn't working, Pattern is fluctuating, sorcery is working at 1/8th power..." -- Random
"...and I have half of your soul." -- Killian
"What?" -- Archi

"Ulysses, it's time to go to Atlantis and save the universe." -- Mok
"OK. Let me change my pants." -- Ulysses

"This is fun. I get to be a different person every morning." -- Wendi to the group

"I wasn't aware that you had this ability, so I didn't factor it into my plans." -- Random
"Damn." -- Archi
"Don't worry, you'll forget all about it." -- Random

"What have you done that Dworkin couldn't handle?" -- Archi
"Oh, come on." -- Ulysses
"Let's not go there." -- Mok

"I will not give birth again." -- Dworkin
"Wah. It was 7,000 years ago." -- Ulysses

"OK, Dworkin, you can either stay here with me and give birth or you can get in the fucking wall." -- Ulysses to Dworkin

"What's wrong with (Ulysses)?" -- Archi
"He's going to give birth in a few months." -- Dworkin

"Don't break my neck!" -- Mok
"Don't be stupid." -- Ulysses
"I'm trying not to." -- Mok

"I wouldn't cast spells at (Killian)." -- Archi
"Well, I'm not going to look at him." -- Mok

"I like it here, it's such a clean, open mind." -- Dworkin
"Huh?" -- Mok

"Ghosts and Shadows"
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Done by Kris Fazzari.

Last modified on April 8, 1997 by Kris Fazzari.