Scroll and quill"Ghosts and Shadows" quotes, Sessions 40-48Scroll and quill

Session 40

"Haven't been thinking of treeing yourself lately?" -- Archi
"No." -- Laughter
"Don't mind me, I'm just going insane." -- Archi

"Is (Sky) doing things I've never seen before?" -- Claudio
"She is doing things you haven't seen before, probably because she hasn't picked up a sword before." -- GM

"Other than Arden being decimated, things are OK." -- GM to Archi

"Don't shoot arrows when you have a tactical nuclear warhead." -- Dann to the group

"There's bodies in these chambers?" -- Kris
"No, they're walking around and doing stuff." -- GM

"Armor, what's armor?" -- Ulysses
"That thing that you're balancing on your head." -- Archi
"No, that's the boat." -- Ulysses

"Can you hold (the fire river back)?" -- Archi
"We'll find out. Run." -- Sandr

"I've got a bone to pick with you." -- Ulysses to Archi, while tapping him with a bone

"Look familiar?" -- Archi
"Yeah, like I know what I slept with nine fucking months ago." -- Ulysses
"This is what Laughter gave birth to." -- Archi
"Oh no. This is not possible. For that would imply that I've had sex with Laughter, which I have not done." -- Ulysses

"And what does that mean?" -- Laughter, after Archi returns her ring
"It means that, as far as sorcery goes, I'm a schmuck." -- Archi

Session 41

"Wait, (Caitlin's) going to ask a man who had a plaid Shadow how to dress for a wedding?" -- Kris to Dwinn, referring to Ulysses

"Look, you're, like, the Chancellor, so go chancel." -- Laughter to Ulysses

"Dismissed!" -- Archi
"I'm not even in the room!" -- Ulysses

"I wasn't going to tell (Archi) at all, but I figured he'd kill me, or something." -- Laughter to Sandr

"Absinthe users are known to die young deaths, usually on their second or third glass." -- Laughter
"Well, I've got one or two to go yet." -- Ulysses

"She's a damn Vestal virgin." -- Merlin
"Now that sounds like a problem." -- Caitlin

"Ulysses, the King wants you!" -- GM
"Everybody wants me." -- Ulysses
"Not that way." -- Archi

"I know why (Archi) does this, but I don't know why." -- Laughter to Ulysses

(Caitlin's) Nicole Kidman." -- Wendi to Dann
"And you are her Batman." -- GM

"I've been here for a year, and talked to many people." -- Caitlin to Ulysses
"And they've all told me you're an easy lay." -- Kris

"Tell me what (the cultists) look like." -- Ulysses
"They were all wearing hooded cloaks. Now what're you going to do, tough guy?" -- Sylvie

"Do you have any idea what that was about? Maybe I should ask Fiona that." -- Caitlin to Laugher

Session 42

"This is a Laughter type of problem." -- Sandr to ?
"It's certainly phrased in Laughter-type language." -- Kris

"(Caitlin) is going to need to go out into Shadow and..." -- Sandr
"Kill some stuff?" -- Laughter

"I understand that (Ulysses) has children, and that he's involved with other people." -- Caitlin
*snicker* -- Laughter

"So, where is everybody?" -- Ulysses
"Who are you looking for?" -- GM
"Everybody." -- Ulysses

"It's helpful if they have time maggots. Magic. It's helpful if they have time maggots." -- GM to Archi, after too little sleep and too much caffeine

"All of the people that you've been trying to slice up can't move now." -- GM
"OK, I'll do some merciful beheading." -- Archi

"When is the world going to realize that kidnapping the King's wife is not the way to get a favor?" -- Dann to the group

"The way I understand it, the entrance to (Ulysses') room was like a rotating door." - Dwinn to Dann

"This game is just not PG-13." -- unknown

"I recall you grabbing me and sticking your tongue half-way down my throat." -- Caitlin to Sandr

"I'm homosexual and in a happy relationship." -- Sandr to Caitlin
"Yeah, that's why you stuck your tongue down her throat." -- Kris

Session 43

"It was not a happy dream." -- Laughter to Archi

"Right. My room is that way. I'll go get dressed." -- Mok to Archi
"That's why he's your personal guard." -- Archi to Laughter

"Laughter's on the bottom and the Archi's on the top?" -- Dann
"Yes, and all is right with the world." -- Shade

"I think I'll go back to the Abyss. It's more relaxing there." -- Melanie to GM

"Is it a demon I recognize?" -- Melanie
"No, it's just one of those generic demons that you can pick up in any underworld bar." -- GM

"Shoot something with (the Trump crossbow bolts). Preferably something living. Something not living. Like, not Mok." -- Ulysses to Archi

"Where is the rabbit?" -- Archi
"In a volcano." -- Ulysses
"That's rather extreme." -- Archi
"Maybe for the rabbit." -- Ulysses

"Cults of the Kings usually connect the king with the fertility of the land. Not that that's a problem here." -- Flynn to Archi

"I figured something out." -- Laughter to ?
"Well, this is a red letter day." -- Kris

"You don't have to actually baby-sit (my children). You just have to make sure no one kills them." -- Laughter to Caitlin

"You see, that's the difference between us, I test theories, and you believe them." -- Ulysses to Sandr

"Oh, I did write those things down. God I love me." -- GM to the group at large

"Hello, my name is Aleksandr Barimen, and I am an Amberite." -- Sandr to Joseph

"Can you send me back where I came from?" -- Ulysses
"Well, Flora's womb probably isn't big enough." -- Jim

"What is her name then?" -- Jim and Edward
"Abigail, or bitch, depending on who you talk to." -- Ulysses

"At least Archi didn't chop off your head." -- Sky to Merlin

"Why are you so pathetic?" -- Sky to Merlin

"I'm sorry, I was dead when I met you!" -- Merlin to Sky

"I am not the one who brought a scantily-clad Greek male back from Shadow and kept him around for a year." -- Merlin
"He followed me!" -- Sky

"(Perseus) has a whole pan." -- GM
"And what is he frying in it, Mer?" -- Dann

"If you die, I will have to come back to haunt you." -- Laughter to Archi

Session 44

"I detail my plan in greater detail." -- Ulysses to GM

"Let the players screw themselves." -- Wendi
"Or each other." -- GM

"Fiona and I did port parly, well believe I knew she was pregnant." -- GM, speaking as Mandor to Ulysses

"Can I take this to mean that you'd rather this not happen again?" -- Caitlin to Sandr, referring to their sexual encounter
"We would!" -- Kris, speaking for the rest of the group

"Uh, you are not alone in pain, asshole!" -- Melanie to Sandr

"(Having the children learn shapeshifting) is much better than waking up in bed as a wolf." -- Laughter
"Yeah, but you weren't the one waking up next to it." -- Archi

"You see, this is why I wanted to eat my breakfast. Now I'm trapped and I'm hungry." -- Ulysses to the group

"(Sandr) knew this was a trap, this is why he took Ulysses with him." -- Emily to the group

"Why doesn't someone wake Sandr up?" -- Caitlin
"Because none of us need that kind of grief right now." -- Archi

"If we don't all stick together, we'll have to stick separately." -- Dwinn to the group

"Removing my soul, while inconvenient, did save me from a few problems." -- Alaric to Archi

"Well, (losing your soul) is better than having your testicles removed." -- Alaric to Archi
"What isn't?" -- Dwinn

Session 45

"I'm not letting you (go home)." -- Dworkin
"You can't stop me." -- Ulysses

"Wait! The phrase, 'You're getting a Trump from...' comes before any of this!" -- Ulysses to GM, after being told that he's answering a Trump call

"That's it? Your daughter is immature, so you doubt this reality?" -- Ulysses to Mandor

"Forgive my apprehension, but the last time I stepped through a Trump call, I got screwed." -- Archi to Ulysses

"Heels are not conducive to battle." -- Caitlin to the group at large

"(Archi) is quite frustrated." -- Ulysses
"Well, it's been three weeks for me." -- Laughter
"Not that kind of frustrated." -- Ulysses

"After that, (Caitlin) doesn't know what to do." -- Dwinn
"Clean up? You're covered in gore!" -- Dann
"There is that." -- Dwinn

"Well, I'm only here for one reason, so if you wish to wake (Melanie) up, by all means." -- Kaedric to Sandr

"If I turn up missing, you're required to come after me." -- Caitlin to the group at breakfast
"Not if it's during breakfast." -- Ulysses

"I'm not sure what I'm asking." -- Kaedric
"Neither am I." -- Caitlin

"The wind is so easy to suck out of (Laughter's) sails." -- Wendi
"That's because the boat doesn't have any sails." -- Dann

Session 46

"Oh, yeah, Claudio will make up for the missing mother-figure in (Daegan's) life." -- Kris to the group

"What's my relationship with Corwin?" -- Claudio to GM
"Strictly platonic." -- Dwinn

"Has Sky ever seen your horse? I bet she'll like it." -- GM to Claudio

"The metaphysics have troubled many. We try not to think about it." -- Corwin to Claudio, referring to how Dworkin and the Unicorn produced Oberon
"We're pretty sure that a step-stool was involved." -- Wendi

"Excuse me, I'm going to go kill some Christians now." -- Claudio to Kaedric

"Then we slay (Melanie's Shadow) by drawing and quartering her." -- Claudio
"I thought you only had three horses?" -- GM

"It's kind of sad when Corwin is the humanitarian in the group." -- Dann to the group

"Perhaps we could broaden out horizons." -- Claudio
"You wish to eat in a gay bar?" -- Corwin

"What is a tactical nuke?" -- Claudio
"Perhaps we should start with guns." -- Corwin

"There are many things that are far more natural then Sandr." -- Archi to Claudio

"I'm the only who's safe from the GM, since I never had sex with anyone who's alive." -- Claudio to the group

Session 47

"Does the otter look flustered?" -- Ulysses to GM

"I'm sure that, somewhere in Shadow, there is the idiomatic phrase 'Let sleeping otters lie.'" -- Ulysses to GM

"Fiona has scheduled an appointment with you at your earliest convenience." -- GM
"That's a stressful way to start the day." -- Archi

"(Caitlin) nods, that's where you shake your head up and down." -- Dwinn to GM

"I'm not privy to my father's couplings." -- Caitlin to Aelle

"If you don't Trump my grandfather, I will gnaw you to death like a sea urchin." -- Beauty to Ulysses

"Am I done puking yet?" -- Caitlin
"No!" -- GM

"Come to the couch, Shade, keep it the bastion of sanity it must be. Or whatEVER!" -- GM to Shade

"I'm so glad the back of my head is gone." -- GM to the group at large

"You make my pages wet their pants in the hall, you clean it up." -- Wendi
"Stay together, cheeks!" -- Dwinn

"I'm erect, why aren't you erect?" -- Dann, quoting "Showgirls"
"Because girls don't do that!" -- GM
"Obviously Todd's not doing his job right!" -- Dann

"If your butts ever get too close together, the alarm goes off." -- GM to the Dan(n)s

"I need to increase my metabolism. We could do this the fun way, or the hard way. Wait, this IS the hard way." -- Kaedric to Melanie

"Don't worry, I won't look." -- Melanie
"You won't???" -- Kaedric, sounding very disappointed
"I'm in hell. I'm in hell." -- Melanie

"(Kaedric) needs to get a Playboy, and go to some distant Shadow gas station." -- GM to the group

"I need to Trump Corwin, because I just found out that they're doing something incredibly stupid!" -- Archi to GM

Session 48

"Mok is useless without Fiona." -- Claudio
"Mok is useless with Fiona." -- Dann

"Dude, Claudio has a thought. I mean Your Highness. Your Majesty." -- Mok to Archi

"So, (Sandr) slept with Benedict's daughter. This is good for him. He's gay! He needs to sleep with more women." -- Claudio to Archi

"Anton, I love you more than anything in the universe. I had to leave you several times to learn this, but..." -- Sandr to Anton

"(Melanie's) a shapeshifter, (her) breasts defy gravity." -- Dann to Kris

"I'm hobnobbing with the most powerful people in the universe, and they have no more self-control than my two-year old." -- Anton to ?
"Guilty!" -- Dann

"Have you ever noticed that the older we get, the more paranoid we are?" -- Archi
"I'm not getting old." -- Laughter
"No, but you are getting paranoid." -- Archi

"Your asses are too close together, and now the warning light is going off." -- GM to the Dan(n)s

"(Melanie) couldn't wear a corset if she were pregnant, and that would annoy her beyond belief." -- Kaedric to Archi

"That's rather unfortunate." -- Archi
"What is?" -- Caitlin
"That you love (Sandr)." -- Archi

"Maybe if I blow Ulysses..." -- Sandr to GM
"Uh, the odds of that happening are one in ten million to fuck no!" -- Dann, quoting the GM's favorite phrase

"My stupid husband is riding out alone to meet the Chaos delegation, from Chaos." -- Laughter to Ulysses

"(Ulysses) would grab a muffin, bemoaning the fact that he's once again missing breakfast, thanks to the bastard that is his king." -- Dann to GM

"It's just a little spy network." -- Laughter to Archi

"So, have you forgiven me for saving our universe, yet?" -- Archi to Laughter

"Don't shatter my bubble of happy delusion." -- Kris
"Are you kidding, I live for that!" -- Dann

"Ghosts and Shadows"
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Done by Kris Fazzari.

Last modified on July 29, 1996 by Kris Fazzari.