Sarah went to the surgery, and the next day there was a jar beside her bed with ten toes in it.
"Don't mistake those for pickles" joked the nurse, munching absently on a colon which was not his own.
Sarah waited to see her new feet until Geraldo had finished and the studio audience had filed out of her room. She made it into a little ceremony, her unveiling. The mayor made a wonderfully short speech, but gaffed by bringing out the silver shovel and digging into her bed. Then Sarah turned down the covers. Slowly, teasingly; she knew how to work an audience.
"ahhh!!" she screamed, upsetting the mood slightly. "there's been some mistake!"
The crowd drew nearer, and indeed there had been. Sarah had a new pair of perfectly formed big pan-shaped feet with handles on them. The crowd dispersed disappointedly. Geraldo's assistant, whose job it was to stick around after filmings to see if anything newsworthy actually happened, told Sarah they couldn't air her story. Sarah sobbed for a while in her room alone. Then she sat up.
"i have to make the best of this thing" she said, and went off in search of the olive man.