You say "You had just gotten done talking to Terry, and you are standing at the side of his pool, where it is relatively quiet except for the little man who keeps insisting you need a martini. It's the middle of the night here in California, but there are no stars. Smoke from LA dominates the sky - what is happening there is a whole mystery. With you is Daimon and Dedan, your two Bright Lilim. And you've just been offered 'back stage passes' and a makeup job. Although Terry swears he'll forget he ever knew any of you."
Dana looks over at Dedan. "What next? Equipment? Tactics?"
The little man asks again, "Martini Ladies? Master? Master? Very dry gin, this is."
Dylan says "No thanks, I like my drinks *wet*."
Dana takes a martini. "Now go away."
Dylan says "Do we have any kind of handy way of getting my map back from Jean?"
Dedan looks to be unhappy to be at the House of a Balseraph. "We need to to get going quickly. And we need a way to get out of Hell - and many people out of Hell - equally as quickly. Equipment? If we went to the Halls of Lightning, we might be able to swipe something. But we'd have to move _now_. It would do us no good if the prisoners end up dead."
Dana says "I've got an idea how to get us out, but I'd like to consult with Jean before planning too much more."
Daimon nods, but he looks distracted.
Dedan says, "At least telling Jean is wise, in case we are never seen again."
Dana nods at Dedan. "He can tell us if we're forgetting something obvious. I believe the doors of the Halls of Lightning are no longer barred, so we should be able to walk in."
Dedan says, "Tether?",p> The little man is back, with another martini. He's pestering Dylan. "Master? Drink master? This is wetter gin. Look, it's liquid!"
Dana turns to Daimon. "Where did we go before? UCLA? How long would it take to get there?"
Dylan ignores the little man.
Daimon ponders the directions, the wind speed, his navel, and african swallows, before he says, "10 minutes, maybe. It's the middle of the night, and while there is traffic, it won't be bad."
The little man continues to pester Dylan. "Master? Martini? Daiquari? Pina Colada?"
Dana sets down the martini glass, which has remained unsipped, and steps over to Daimon. "Okay. Is that fast enough for you, Dedan? We could always follow Daimon and Dylan up."
Dedan considers, and says, "I'm not ascending from the house of a Balseraph. Hell's time moves in mysterious ways, I'd prefer us to be whole and safe before we descend to the Pit. Let's take the tether."
Dana nods, and puts her arm around Daimon. "Anyone know where we can get a vehicle?"
Daimon says, "Terry. I'll, uh, I'll go talk to him. I'll try to ignore him to the best of my ability."
Dedan wrinkles her nose. "Balseraph."
Dana frowns slightly. "He'll have us followed. Call a cab? Borrow a news van?"
Daimon looks at Dylan. "Steal a news van?"
Dylan says "Promise to take a camera crew with us, and then tie them up and gag them?"
Dedan gives Dylan a level stare. "And why would we do that? We don't Need to do that."
Dana says "Let's just find one."
Dedan doesn't seem entirely keen on this unlawful, unjust, and nebulously Windy of all things course of action. Daimon is already off looking for a truck.
Dylan has been nostalgic for Windyness of late, and so goes along with it easily.
Dana says "Dedan, come on. Do you need to move on this or not?"
Dedan says "This is optimal. It's not lawful, but they _are_ demons. Let's just move. And not think too hard about it."
Dana follows The Attuned One wherever he may go, and drags along Dedan and Dylan.
In front of the mansion, surrounded by people not paying much attention and milling, is a whole cabal of news vans.
Dana says "We'll take the farthest one out. Daimon, does Terry's driveway have a gate? I don't remember."
Daimon says "No gate. That would stop the flow of adoring fans to worship at his feet."
Dana says "Makes sense. If there are keys, Dedan or I will drive out, nice and sane. If not, I hope one of you two can hotwire."
The farthest one out has someone sitting in the driver's seat, not paying attention, with headphones on.
Dana says "I'll go up and distract?"
Dedan nods. "Seems reasonable, although no one is paying attention."
Dana points behind a nearby van. "I'd rather not use violence unless necessary. Stay here."
Daimon is already sneaking through the crowd. Sneak sneak sneak *wump*. And someone says, "Hey, aren't you that Dai-" "Yeah, I'm that guy. 'Squeeze me."
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Dana drags whoever is not already doing so through the crowd, staring at
the ground trying to look grumpy.
Dylan gets dragged.
The angels passing through the crowd are well ignored, except for the
occasional jossle, by the people busily recording up to the minute
coverage on the biggest story of their lives - Armageddon.
The van is reached without a hassle.
Dana listens a bit to the coverage as we walk through.
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The guy in the van bops away to the music on his headphones, utterly
oblivious to people macking on his truck.
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Dana makes a 'stay back' motion to the angels, and walks up to the van.
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The guy is still Capt. Oblivious. Bop bop bop shu-bop.
Dana raps loudly on the door, sneering at the guy.
<
The guy starts! And peers at Dana. He pulls off his headphones, leans
over, and rolls down the window. "Yah? We're all outta snickers bars,
Milwalkee's Best, Armageddon t-shirts and those hats that hold the two
cans and have straws. Try the next van, lady."
Dana glares at the guy. "I don't give a fuck. Someone wants you
inside."
In the background someone is going, "Hey man, can I have your
autograph..."
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The guy says "Yah? Who?"
Dana says "Terry. You gonna go or you gonna sit here and wait for me to
drag you?"
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The guy says "You look pretty skinny to me, lady."
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The guy starts getting out of the news van anyway.
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Dana glares at the guy some more. "Come on. I haven't got all fucking
day."
The guy climbs all the way out. "Okay, okay, I'm moving. You don't have to
be so goddamn pushy. It's not like the world is coming to an end."
Dana waits for the guy to get all the way out of the van. "Oh, aren't you
just clever."
The guy says "Damn straight I am." Then he starts moving in the direction
of the house.
Dana glances into the van to see if he left the keys.
No keys.
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Dylan will attempt to hotwire the van, assuming no objections from
Dana.
Dylan finds the ground. He finds the starter wires. He pulls the glob out
by the steering column, rips a wire apart, sticks the ends together, and
_varoom_ the news van starts.
Dylan smiles proudly.
The van idles.
Dylan says "Milady, your carriage awaits."
Dana meanders back to the van and gets in, assuming the guy doesn't turn
around and follow.
Dana is quickly followed by a disapproving Dedan. It takes a moment from
Daimon to scrape off the fans who are demanding autographs to get in after
her. But a minute or so after the hotwire, and everyone is in the van.
Dylan offers to drive.
Dana takes the wheel.
Dylan figured she would.
Dana says "No."
Dana makes it a point to follow traffic laws very very carefully,
especially now.
Dana makes sure everyone is wearing seatbelts before driving off.
There is almost no traffic going _in_ to LA. Going out.... it's jammed for
miles and miles. Ahead, the city looks like it's on fire.
Dylan softly sings "Born to be Wild".
Dana says "Hmm. Does this look like a bad idea to anyone else?"
>From the back, Daimon says "Dude! Armageddon t-shirts! Hey, Dylan, you
wanna t-shirt? They're bright orange and say 'I lived through the Wrath of
God'."
Dedan simply answers Dana with, "Yes."
Dylan would take a T-shirt, except it wouldn't match the rest of his
look.
Dana looks at Dedan briefly. "Any other ideas?"
Dedan says "No."
There is no traffic ahead.
Dana keeps driving. "If we run into anything bad, the Creationers can
ascend and we'll follow. We can go to the Halls that way. Okay?"
Dedan nods her head. "Fine."
Daimon pulls off his tie dye t-shirt and replaces it with a bright orange
one.
Dana looks into the rear view mirror to see the people in the back. "Did
the Creationer contingent get that?"
Dedan says, "Pull over to the side of the road."
Dylan says "Got it."
Dylan looks out the window. "Memo to self: when world ends, avoid
freeway."
Dana blinks at Dedan, and pulls over to a safeish-looking place.
Dedan turns to the Creationers. "Ascend. We will follow you."
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Dylan blinks. "Did we run into something bad?"
Dana says "Just go, Dylan."
Dana says "Everyone have enough Essence?"
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Dylan has all the Essence he can hold at the moment.
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Daimon also has essence. "Sheesh. Man, demanding."
Dana smiles at Daimon. "You first. Dedan follows, then Dylan, then me."
Daimon undoes his seat belt, and ascends to his heart in a puff of
essence.
Dedan swiftly follows.
Dylan ascends.
Dana ascends.
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The Halls of Creation looks remarkable like.... the Halls of Creation.
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Dana says "Anyone on good terms with Lightning?"
Dylan says "Well, I'm not on *bad* terms with them..."
Dylan looks for somebody who looks like s/he knows what s/he is doing.
Dana says "Close enough" and starts walking to leave as if she knows where
she is going.
There are several beings around. Of course, they are Creationers, so they
may be deliberately not knowing what they are doing. One Elohite over...
yonder is wandering around with a blindfold and attempting to grok the
optimality of the floor.
Dylan says "Eenie meanie miney moe..."
Dedan naturally follows Dana.
Dana doesn't pay much attention, and tries to herd her two Creationers out
the door.
Dylan heads out.
Daimon gets herded. "Hey, there's a guy over there, and he's checking out
the floor. Hey! Come on now..."
Dana speaks softly to Daimon. "I'm sorry. You know how important this is
to Dedan."
Daimon nods. "I know, I know. I'm just easily distracted."
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Dana takes Daimon's hand and smiles. "Come on."
Dedan just crosses her arms, and follows out, purposefully, whispy aura
wings trailing behind.
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Getting out of the Halls of Creation and going to the Halls of Technology
is an amazingly easy task. No fallen Superiors accost anyone. There are no
hordes of crazed Stonies. There is nothing being burnt down. It's pretty
peaceful.
Inside the door the quad of D's pass through into the Halls of Technology,
there is the regular desk, and Seraph secretary, and an amazingly cute
Kyriotate.
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Dana walks up to the secretary. Does s/he look busy?
Sephar crosses the lobby thoughtfully, silver cloud floating quietly
along.
The secretary always looks busy. The secretary makes a point of looking
busy. Efficincy is key. Efficincy is - er, for the Elohites, but this
helps.
The secretary also looks up at Dana and says, "Yes? What do you want?"
Dana says "A short meeting with the Archangel of Lightning. We would like
to ask his advice."
Dana figures there's no point in beating around the bush. :^)
The secretary blinks, and types a few things on her keyboard with special
Seraph appendages. "And you are....?"
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Dana says "Torquaret, Cherub of Judgement. This is Dylan and Daimonique.
The three of us have been here recently. Dedan here was not."
The Seraph blinks, coughs, and says, "I'm so sorry. The Archangel of
Lightning is ... ah... um... washing his hair. He can't see you."
The Seraph blinks crosseyed at her screen.
Dana blinks at the Seraph. "Excuse me?"
Dylan does not often hear that excuse from Seraphim.
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Sephar blinks many eyes at the Seraph.
<
The Seraph says with the sense of purpose of one wired into the Truth.
"He's washing his hair. It says so right on my screen."
Sephar keeps rolling along, though entirely startled by that statement
from a Seraph.
The Seraph waves to Sephar. "Excuse me, there. Can you come here for a
moment?"
Dana blinks again. "Washing his hair. Does this happen frequently? We
would prefer his insight if at all possible."
Sephar says "Certainly."
Sephar rolls over to the Seraph cheerfully.
The Seraph blinks. "I don't... ah.... Sephar! Can you read this
screen?"
Sephar says "I didn't think the Boss *had* hair."
Sephar peers at the screen.
The screen does indeed say, on Jean's calendar, "Washing Hair". The next
hour has been blocked out.
Sephar says "Wow."
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Sephar says "That's what it says, okay. Hair washing."
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Sephar says "For the next hour."
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The Seraph blinks at Sephar.
Sephar hms, "I wonder if he's washing someone else's hair?"
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Sephar peers bemusedly at the screen.
Dana stands and waits patiently.
The Seraph picks up the phone, and speaks into it. "Ah, is the Boss
washing his - ah, someone got into the system. Yes. I'm to send them right
up. Of course." She hangs up the phone. "Sephar, could you escort our
guests up to the Testing Bay Gamma in laboratory 16 please?"
Sephar says "Sure."
The Seraph says "Thank you."
Dana says "Thanks!"
Sephar perks up considerably. "Keen. The testing bays..."
Dedan looks incredulous. Daimon looks happy, though. Cool stuff is _cool_,
because Stuff _rocks_.
Dana smiles and follows Sephar. "That was weird."
Sephar rolls on out to the named Bays, "It was. I wonder what got into the
system."
Dylan follows along.
Dana reaches out a hand to the Kyrio. "I'm Torquaret, but you can call me
Dana. It's shorter."
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Sephar shakes Dana's hand with a slender, female hand, "I'm Sephar, it's
pretty short to begin with. Dana's pretty."
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Dana smiles at Sephar, and keeps following. "Thanks. That's nice of
you."
Dylan extends his hand as well. "Abdijamin. Or Dylan, to friends, enemies,
and everyone else."
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Sephar shakes Dylan's hand with a fairly solid hand on his side, and bobs
a bit of cloud at the introduction.
Sephar says "You folks must be into some fairly heavy stuff to get a
look-see at the mecha tests."
Dana blinks again. "Mecha tests?"
Sepharcloud bobs mildly, "That's where you're going, I think."
Sephar says "Beautiful setups those."
Dana looks confused. "What's a mecha test?"
Sephar says is reverently.
The Testing Bays are enormous. And amazingly safe! There are doors to labs
lining the walls, and lines of workbenches. Angels move too and fro.
Dana mmms. Safe. Nice, safe Attuned One.
Sephar beams at entering the Bays, "You'll get to see, Dana." and leads
the way to the Gamma bay.
Sephar peers a bit at the lab numbers to find 16, first, and then deeper
in to the Bay.
The Gamma bay is where the Mecha from the battles in the Marches were
returned. There are large screens and whiteboards filled with data, and
angels walk around, making notes, talking about their next tests. Lab 16's
door is standing open.
Dana sounds curious. "Wow. Okay." She looks around at all the stuff.
The place is filled with Stuff.
Daimon says "Oh wow... _stuff_."
Dylan considers messing with the data on the whiteboards, but decides
against.
Sephar floats about happily, with all the Stuff.
Dedan looks with the eye of someone who wants to get a move-on.
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Dana smiles the contented smile of a Cherub with a happy Attuned One, and
follows Sephar.
Sephar wanders into Lab 16's open door.
Inside lab 16 is Jean - who is not, in fact, washing his hair. He is
looking at a newly digitized version of Dylan's map, and on the table is
an interesting device.
Dana follows, gently dragging the Attuned One along.
Dylan looks at the interesting device.
Sephar blinks, "Oh, hi, Sir. Here are some people that need to see you and
ask your advice."
Jean turns to the angels who enter. "Ah yes, I was expecting you, as there
was a 95.7% chance that you four would arrive here in the Halls of
Technology. Therefore, I have prepared for your arrival, as you can see.
Welcome, Sephar."
Sephar rolls a Kyriotate bow and meanders behind the incoming group, to
let them have his Boss' attention.
Dana nods at Jean. "Thank you for giving us your time."
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Jean says "My calculations show an increased probability of your urgent
need to descend into Hell with your arrival, so I have prepared for this
eventuality. The map provided before has been updated and rerendered in
real time three dimensions for optimal navigational ability. I have also
provided one of our new Bridgestones."
Dana says "How accurate is the map?"
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Jean says "We are not able to keep it to the second, unfortunately, but
the current map is accurate to within the hour, and will continue to
download updates for you on regular intervals as long as the device stays
intact. We have perfected the tunnelling protocol between realms which
provideds for this, so it should be highly reliable."
Dana nods. "Amazing. What does the device do?"
Jean says "Ah yes. This is a highly modified Bridgestone. It is designed
to activate a certain set of Songs which will work as a sort of 'portable
tether' if you will. Since you are no doubt getting captives out of Hell,
it is suboptimal to force them to follow you back out, as you will have no
demons in your party. Therefore you place the Bridgestone on the floor,
press the button, and wait. It's been fault tested for reliability."
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Daimon says "Wow, cool."
Dana says "Interesting. Though getting in is seems more of an issue than
getting out, from my perspective."
Dylan says "I had a REALLY easy time getting in once, but it's not
something I'd care to repeat..."
Dana says "Dominic knows we are coming this time, and can see into my and
Dedan's Hearts."
Jean says "It folds down. Observe." He presses a red button, and the
entire contraption folds down on itself until it is about the size of a
pager. "As for getting in, I am afraid I cannot provide you adequate
assistance is actually descending. On the other hand, I do have something
else...."
Jean whips out a few more devices, the size of small Star Trek badges and
places them on the table. "These will help to disguise your true natures.
You will not be entirely Masked, but it will help with the illusion. Those
who wish to see demons, well, will. They also work as translators for
Helltongue. But clothing and additions to your disguises you will need to
provide yourselves."
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Dana nods. "Is there any way to keep Dominic from seeing through our
Hearts? There's no point in sneaking in if he can see where we are."
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Jean ponders.
Jean says "I can do nothing about your Hearts directly, unless you are in
my direct service temporarily."
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Dana looks at Dedan.
Dedan looks... impassive, and then looks back at Dana.
Jean says, as he turns to putz away at something else on the whiteboard
behind him, "It is the optimal solution for your current problem. I would,
of course, release you from service should a more proper Superior arise.
It is not practical to keep unhappy angels from going where they would
work most efficently."
Demiurge pages: What a good thing Jean's not a Seraph. "No. You can _not_
go back to work for Lilith."
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You paged Demiurge with 'You know that is what he is thinking.'.
<
Dana ponders. "What are our chances of success each way?"
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Jean writes on the board. "If you continue with your Heart in Dominic's
possession, your success rate drops to 31.672%, without much margin for
error. If you choose this path, you rise to over 75%, which indicates to
me, taking in all factors and variables and considering that there are
unknowns and the essential fractal nature of the universe, that this would
be your optimal choice to pursue."
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Dedan just blinks at that. "If it will get our people out faster, then
fine."
Dana looks at Jean. "Would it be possible to do this and leave our current
attunments in place?"
Dana is hesitant, in general, about this.
Jean says "Certainly."
Dana says "Okay, as long as we can agree that this is temporary. I don't
think either of us is giving up on Judgement yet."
Jean says "Of course. Are you ready for this?"
Dana nods.
Jean walks over and places his hand on Dana's forehead. There's a....
change. It's not worse or better, it's just different. The world suddenly
has a certain clarity, where all of the parts fit together in the
universe, where things go together in their optimal configurations. It's
like a sudden clarity, like the sun peeking out behind clouds. There is
something dark, and nasty, and lurking in Dana's soul that is suddenly
banished, filled with the clear light of Heaven. Dana also finds that she
has something... else. Like the Cherub of Lightning attunement.
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Jean stands back. "It is suboptimal for you to continue to lose your
cellphone."
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Jean steps over to Dedan, and does the same thing.
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When Jean is done, Dedan blinks several times, the color of her aura
changing from the harsh dark grays of Judgment to the bright blue and
white of Lightning.
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Dana blinks a couple of times. Clarity. Neat. Haven't seen that in a
while.
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Jean tells Dylan, "And you shall be able to herewith communicate between
them without flaw." He lays hands on Dylan for a moment, and gives him the
Mercurian of Lightning attunement.
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Dylan says "Thank you."
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Jean says "You are most welcome. Now take the devices and godspeed. Time
is wasting."
Dana says "Yes. Thank you. Wow. May we take a couple extra of the badges
in case anyone else wishes to join us?"
Sephar watches all mildly curious.
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Jean says "There are here only four. Any more members in your party
dramatically increase your chances of being spotted."
Dana nods and turns to the group. "Thank you again. Let's go.",p>
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Sephar leads the way back to the reception area, if they have need of a
guide...
Dana probably doesn't need a guide, but follows Sephar anyway. She smiles
a lot. "Wow. Everything is so different."
The group returns to the receptiona area, without incident.
Sephar says "Oh?"
Dana puts the portable tether safely in her pocket. "Yeah. It's
interesting. It was nice meeting you, Sephar. Maybe we can talk again
sometime?"
Sephar rolls a bow, "That would be most pleasant. God go with you on your
journey and may your task work out elegantly."
Dana smiles at Sephar and nods back. "Be effecient. And Just." And heads
outside.
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Outside, the world looks a little brighter, and cleaner, and more
efficient. Even the air smells a little cleaner.
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Sephar smiles a bit at the parting and then goes back to doing the errand
it was going.
<
Dana's eyes are bright and wide, seeing the universe from a different
perspective. She turns to Dedan, clearly the only other person in this
group who can grasp the concept of logical planning, and says "Do we need
anything else? Weapons? Lock picks? Explosives? It didn't even occur to me
to ask Jean, but if he didn't think it was necessary, maybe he thinks
we're as ready as we'll ever be."
Dedan says "It will be almost impossible to get through checkpoints with
Heavenly weapons in Hell."
Dana nods. "Okay. Should we find out if that Fire tether is still around,
and see if we can nab that Game Impudite? I don't know that we can take
out as many Corruption demons as we think we can."
Daimon asks "Are you suggesting we go to hell and bust heads? I mean,
heck, I hear my dentist is an all night shop, and I need some new
crowns..."
Dana smiles at Daimon. "No, dear. We're going to do everything we can to
sneak in all nice and quiet. But we will run into guards and such."
Dedan says "The Game Impudite might have some access to tethers to Hell.
After all, there had to be some way for him to get to Earth and back, and
he was required to report regularly."
Dana nods at Dedan. "To the Volcano, then?"
Dedan says "Indeed."
Dana takes Daimon's hand in her paw and starts ushering everyone toward
the Volcano. "We'll have to avoid the Judges there, for now. Dominic still
has many of their Hearts."
Dylan hums a few bars of "I Left My Heart In San Francisco."
Dedan follows Dana, looks happy to be getting somewhere at _last_.
You are not hindered on the way to the Volcano. There are angels flying
back and forth, and for once, they seem to wave welcome as they pass. On
the other hand the tether... is no longer there. It's gone.
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Dedan says "Clearly, in no way is this going to be easy."
Dylan says "So at least life is consistent."
Dana grins at Dedan. "Good thing we're not going to let that stop us.
Okay. Dominic knows we've talked to the Media, and he knows we know he
knows. It makes little difference whether we go through Media or find some
other way."
Daimon says "I doubt the Media is just going to let Corruption show up and
sit on their tethers. Okay, maybe they will. It is the MEDIA. Wait, they
probably will. But only if Corruption gives away boxes of pens, pads of
paper, squeezy balls, diskettes, and t-shirts with the Corruption Brand
Name on it.
Dana says "They'll annoy Corruption for interviews. Might be an
interesting stalling tactic. So we go back to Terry's, yes?"
Daimon says "Terry is, as he likes to tell people over and over again, the
living and breathing hub of the known universe."
Dedan just wrinkles her nose in a "We have to do what we have to do, but
god does it suck" manner.
Dana nods sympathetically at Dedan. "Except this time, he might be right.
Do we need anything else up here?"
Dedan looks over the other three. "I would think not. Other then more
time."
Demiurge pages: Worrying thought. Dana can now invoke Jean if necessary.
"Eat Lightning, Corruption-sucker!"
Dana nods. "I'd be happier with a weapon of some sort, but maybe I can
pick one up along the way. Let's go."
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>From afar, Demiurge imagines Dana's face when asked to sign the CCG card
of artist's impression of her posing naked with scales and sword on the
back of a fallen Dominic.
The four D's of the Apocalypse descend to where they were before - at
Terry's pool. Although there are now people milling everywhere, no one
seems to notice, or care. People appearing out of the air is just not as
interesting as the flaming battle between two beings which are being
hailed as "proof of alien existence" over India.
Dana says "So now we're off to makeup? What kind of look do we want to go
for here?"
>From the porch come a group of figures silhuetted by the porchlight. The
tall thin one with the pony tail and the only guy to be wearing shades in
the middle of the night has got to be Terry. "Dana! Dylan! Baby! Where did
you all go? I was worried that something had happened. Look, we have
everything ready for you, and we're ready to go to makeup. Now, these
people I pay by the hour, so let's get a move on, chop chop babies. Oh,
you all are beautiful, I could just slather you up in salsa and eat you
you're so yummy. Come on come on now."
Daimon says something under his breath about becoming rapidly convinced
that Terry has replaced his eyes with giant fried eggs.
Dana grins up at Terry. "We'll be up in a minute!" She takes a Creationer
in each hand and drags them inside.
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Dana makes sure all artifacts are suitably hidden before going inside.
Dedan trails behind. Terry flashes a big, warm, Media Producer smile like
only he can - you know, the kind that flashes his caps and makes you think
he's going for your throat. The place is insane as always. Madness
everywhere, whereever you look. "Baby," he says, "I was worried. Through
this door, down these stairs, yeah, that's right baby, down into
makeup."
Dana lets go of the Creationers and walks up to Terry. "You are truly
amazing. A work of art."
<
<
Makeup is like a beauty salon. Big mirrors with lights, tall chairs, racks
of combs and brushes and hair dryers, and smiling helpful people standing
behind every one, just waiting to start their masterwork of
Transformation.
Dylan, having previously worked only in print media, is not used to
this.
Smiling happy people get the four angels to sit in chairs. The makeup
looks unnatural - the assurance as translated through the Helltongue
translators is that it will make you all look more 'demonic then ever
before'.
Dylan just knows he's gonna come out of this looking like a Bad Goth.
As Dana gets into the chair, Terry walks up to her. He's holding a long
thin box. He puts it on the counter before her, in a clear spot around
the cannisters and jars. He opens the box and pulls out.... a card. On it,
it has a picture of a, ah, um, glorified Dana in the nude with a sword
stabbing some icky nasty creature. On the top of the card it says
"Torquaret - Mistess of Justice". Terry says "First run. I need a few of
these signed, if you could.... "
Dana just blinks for a moment. "What?"
Terry says "It's our newest marketing idea! The Armageddon Collectable
Card Game! You and your cohorts have becomes so popular lately, baby, that
we started running the cards. And you see, sweetcheeks, sweety-pie, love
of my eye, she who makes my heart pitter AND patter, you're a rare, see.
And we need it for the promotion. Here's my pen..."
Dana takes the pen and laughs. "Who would buy this, Terry? Why would
someone buy this?"
Terry says "In Hell, they LOVE you guys. Of course, we have to put a
little spin on things, but you know how it goes. Dana, crusading for
Justice! And poor Daimie here, who was horribly brainwashed... and
Maxwell the stalwart and Blitzen the insane and um, Dylan, my friend, ah,
you're a sort of an uncommon instead of a rare. You know." He flashes a
grin. "The kids love 'em! They love all of you!"
<
Dana writes on the card 'Be good, or else! -- Torquaret' She looks up at
the Balseraph. "Terry, you're insane, but I still love you."
Terry starts passing the cards out to everyone. "Just sign. Sign and have
fun, kids. Dylan, the dark goth look does you good, kid."
<
The last place you were was outside the Halls of Lightning. With
you are Dylan, Dedan, and Daimon. For some odd cosmic reason, everyone in
this game's name starts with D, no one knows why but it's very likely to
be integral to the plot. You now have an artifact that will zots you back
up to Heaven with a group of people rapidly, and you have little Star Trek
like pins that will translate Helltongue for you like Universal
Translators, because you can never have enough plot devices. Now you are
Torquaret of Lightning, the world looks nice and crisp and clean to you.
Dedan's wing aura has gone from the drab brown of Judgment to the bright
streaky blue of Lightning. Dominic no longer looks over your shoulder.
It's the middle of the night in California, and below you the world is
coming to an end. But you can get t-shirts, so all is not lost! The
question now is - now what.