FKFIC-L WAR Drinking Game
by Perri Smith with contributions from Abby Albrecht, Amparo Bertram,
and Cath Boone
Since you have to be drunk most of the time to get through a war anyway,
here's a helpful guide to achieving that condition. M&M's and peanut
butter cups can be substituted for alcohol -- Amaretto and Jim
Bean/Bushmills are recommended.
- ATTACKS
- Any character is attacked -- 1 drink
- Nick is attacked and it involves bricks -- 2 drinks
- Nick is attacked and it involves his underwear and/or PJ's -- 3 drinks
- Nick is attacked and it involves the loft -- 4 drinks
- Nick is attacked and it involves none of the above -- chug
- LaCroix is attacked and it involves CERK -- 2 drinks
- LaCroix is attacked and it involves garlic -- 3 drinks
- LaCroix is attacked and it involves cows -- 4 drinks
- LaCroix is attacked and it involves a thong -- chug like your life
depends on it. If you can't remember the scene, he might not kill you
later.
- Vachon is attacked and it involves cows -- 1 drink
- Vachon is attacked and it involves his hair -- 2 drinks
- Vachon is attacked and it involves his guitar -- 3 drinks
- Vachon is attacked and it involves his motorcycle -- 4 drinks
- Vachon is attacked by a Vaquera -- chug
- The Raven gets redecorated -- 1 drink
- The church gets redecorated -- 2 drinks
- The loft gets redecorated -- 3 drinks
- CERK's signal get hijacked -- 4 drinks
- Any of the above involve cows and/or Barney -- chug
- The Lurkers attack anyone -- chug. You'll need it. The characters
certainly will. <g>
- Any faction is attacked -- 1 sip
- Any individual is attacked -- 2 sips
- Anyone's apartment is attacked -- 1 drink
- Anyone's clothes are attacked -- 2 drinks
- Anyone's computer is attacked -- 3 drinks
- Anyone's pet is attacked -- 4 drinks (5 if it's Sydney)
- Any of the above involve Barney -- chug
- A car is attacked -- 1 drink
- It's not the Caddie -- 2 drinks
- It is the Caddie, but Susan Garrett didn't do it -- 3 drinks
- The car blows up -- 4 drinks
- It was the Caddie -- chug
- Anyone is attacked and it involves drugs -- 1 drink
- It involves bodypaint -- 2 drinks
- It involves fish -- 3 drinks
- It involves Duncan Macleod or Highlander -- 4 drinks
- Duncan Macleod actually shows up -- chug
- Walter Skinner actually shows up -- drop the bottle and run for the
door
- Anyone videotapes an attack -- 1 drink
- Said videotape is copied more than once -- 2 drinks
- By the faction that was attacked -- 3 drinks
- All copies of said videotape is thought to be destroyed by the end of
the war -- 4 drinks
- Said videotape is actually destroyed -- chug
- FLASHBACKS
- A listmember has a flashback -- 1 drink
- Nick has a flashback -- 2 drinks
- Any other vampire has a flashback -- 3 drinks
- The other vampire is LaCroix -- 4 drinks
- LaCroix has a flashback and it's not humiliating -- chug
- FACTIONS
- A NatPacker threatens physical injury to Nick -- 1 drink
- It's not Sharon Himmemen -- 2 drinks
- The NatPack attacks themselves -- 1 drink
- The NatPack attacks anyone else -- 2 drinks
- Anyone else attacks the NatPack -- 3 drinks
- An attack on anyone uses drugs and is not performed by the
NatPack -- 4 drinks
- The NatPack winds up in the hospital due to drug overdoses -- chug
- The Knighties puppy-pile Nick -- 1 drink
- Cath Boone and/or Perri Smith yell at Nick -- 2 drinks
- Scottie falls at Nick's feet -- 3 drinks
- Sandra Grey falls at Nick's feet - 4 drinks
- Sandra falls at LaCroix's feet -- chug, since she
obviously has. <g>
- A Knightie is kidnapped - 1 drink
- The Knighties retaliate with Nick's help -- 2 drinks
- The Knighties retaliate without Nick's help -- 3 drinks
- The Knighties retaliate against Nick's orders -- 4 drinks
- The Knighties attack with no provocation whatsoever -- chug
- Someone hires a Merc -- 1 drink
- The payment is chocolate -- 2 drinks
- The payment is episode tapes -- 3 drinks
- The payment is clothes -- 4 drinks
- A Merc reveals who hired him/her -- chug, then go rat on them to the
Poobah
- The Ravenettes go shopping -- 1 drink (2 if any involved parties are
male)
- The Ravenettes throw a party -- 2 drinks
- A Ravenette cowers in fear of Janette -- 3 drinks
- A Ravenette laughs at, smart-mouths or otherwise annoys Janette -- 4
drinks
- It's not LJC -- chug
- The Cousins are attacked -- 1 sip
- The Cousins retaliate all out of proportion -- 2 sips
- The Cousins cower in fear of LaCroix -- 1 sip
- The Cousins attack for no reason -- 1 drink
- A Cousin gets called on the carpet by LaCroix --2 drinks
- The Cousins are forced to take over CERK -- 3 drinks
- The Cousins are attacked for absolutely no reason -- 4 drinks
- The Cousins attack LaCroix for absolutely no reason -- chug. Then
run. Kudos if you make it through the door without running into it.
[the lewd version:
- The Cousins strip LaCroix down for whatever reason -- chug, because so
far this game is being written by Knighties, not Cousins]
- Anyone writes Screed in Clockwork Orange-speak -- 1 drink
- Anyone has to ask for help writing Clockwork Orange-speak -- 2 drinks
- The Nick&NatPack attack the Immortal Beloveds -- 1 drink
- The Immortal Beloveds respond -- 2 drinks
- The Die-Hards give sanctuary to anyone -- 1 drink
- A faction is mistakenly attributed to an Unaffiliated -- 1 drink
- Said Unaffiliated allows the offender to live -- 2 drinks
- Someone defects to the Knighties -- 1 drink
- Someone defects to the Cousins -- 2 drinks
- Someone defects to the Mercs -- 3 drinks
- Someone defects to the NatPack - 4 drinks
- A defector is attacked by one or more factions in revenge -- take
yourself and your drink to cover, then chug
- Nick denies responsibility for his faction -- 1 drink
- Natalie is ignored by her faction -- 1 drink
- Janette is amused by her faction --1 drink
- Lacroix threatens his faction -- 1 drink
- Vachon hides from his faction -- 1 drink
- LIFE AFTER DEATH
[Warning: you can get seriously blitzed in this section during War 6]
- Someone sees the ghost of Schanke -- 1 drink
- Someone sees the ghost of Cohen -- 2 drinks
- Someone sees the ghost of Schankelvis -- 3 drinks
- It's not a lurker -- chug
- A character gets resurrected -- 1 drink
2 if it's Vachon
3 if it's Screed or Urs
4 if it's Tracy
chug if it's Divia
- Anyone attempts to bribe the Warmistress to resurrect a character -- 1
drink
- They succeed -- 2 drinks
- Anyone comments on how many characters are getting resurrected -- 3
drinks
- Anyone complains how many characters have died -- everyone drinks in
sympathy, then calls Jim Parriott.
- BEHIND THE SCENES
- Anyone leaves the WAR: header off their post -- 1 drink
- Anyone sends a post to FORKNI-L by accident -- 2 drinks
- Anyone leaves the date and time off their post -- 3 drinks
- The timeline keeper attempts to murder them -- 4 drinks
- The Warmistress decides to let her -- chug
- The editor wishes that she could hurt a few people herself -- 2 drinks
- A post drops after the official War ends -- 1 drink
- A post drops more than 12 hours after the War ends -- 2 drinks
- There is no apology -- 3 drinks
- Anyone posts before the War begins -- 1 drink
- The list is held - 1 drink
- The list is held on the first day of the war -- 2 drinks
- Someone's account crashes during the war -- 3 drinks
- A faction leader's account crashes during the war -- 4 drinks
- It's an AOL account -- chug and sit around bashing Steve Case
- The list is held during a cease-fire -- a drink for each listowner
- The list is held after the War ends -- a drink for each listmember
- The leader loop is larger than any faction loop -- 1 drink
- The leader loop doesn't come up with a 'plot' until two days before
the war ends -- 2 drinks
- The leader loop winds up tracking three+ simultaneous plots -- 3
drinks
- The leader loop commits mass murder and/or suicide-- 4 drinks
- Everyone survives -- chug. You've earned it.
- The leader loop is completely sober at any given moment during the war
-- chug, man, chug! You're falling behind!
- MISCELLENEOUS
- Anyone sings karaoke -- 1 drink
- Anyone sings and it's from 'Phantom of the Opera' -- 2 drinks
- Anyone sings Phantom without benefit of karaoke -- 3 drinks
- Anyone sings 'Phatom without benefit of drugs -- 4 drinks
- It's not a NatPacker -- chug
- Any one refers to 'The Guy' -- 1 drink
- Anyone refers to 'The Old Guy' -- 2 drinks
- Anyone refers to the 'Really Old Guy' -- 3 drinks
- Anyone asks who any of the above are -- 4 drinks
- The Guy or the ROG make guest appearances -- chug. Then go pick up the
people who fainted and/or slipped in the puddles
- Anyone drools over Nick -- 1 drink
- Anyone drools over Vachon -- 2 drinks
- Anyone drools over Miklos -- 3 drinks
- Susan Garrett is forced to use a Supersoaker on droolers -- 4 drinks
- Anyone drools over Tracy or Screed -- chug
- Anyone gets whammied -- 1 drink
- It's a vampire -- 2 drinks
- A vampire feeds on a listmember -- 1 drink
- Said listmember is brought across -- 2 drinks
- The Warmistress stakes the new vampire for flagrant rule violations --
- 3 drinks
- Anyone is whammied into thinking she's Janette -- 1 drink
- It's not Amy Hull -- 2 drinks
- It's not a NatPacker at all -- 3 drinks
- Anyone knows something they couldn't possibly know -- 1 drink
- Someone else points this out -- 2 drinks
- Anyone mentions the Abarat -- 1 drink
- Anyone finds the Abarat -- 2 drinks
- It really is the Abarat -- 3 drinks
- It survives to the end of the war -- chug
- Anyone is watching videos -- 1 drink
- The videos are FK episodes -- 2 drinks
- 'Only the Lonely' is not mentioned -- 3 drinks
- The video is 'The Boys from Syracuse' or 'Legends of the Fall' -- 4
drinks
- The video watchers are throwing socks -- chug and duck, aim tends to
be pretty bad
- A mountie shows up -- 1 drink
- Someone drools over said mountie -- 2 drinks
- The mountie is Benton Fraser -- 3 drinks and get out of the way
- Anyone gets sick during a war -- 1 drink
- Anyone spends more than half the war in a virtual coma -- 2 drinks
- It's not Diane E -- 3 drinks
- Anyone refers to Tracy as 'a good cop' -- 1 drink
- Anyone throws a party at the Raven -- 1 drink
- Any major events are held outside of Toronto -- 2 drinks
- Any fanfic character shows up in the war -- 1 drink
- It's not Dorian -- 2 drinks
- Anyone breaks into any of Nick's bank accounts -- 1 drink
- The Raven changes ownership -- 2 drinks
- The new owner is not a Ravenette or a Cousin -- 3 drinks
- A meeting is held in the Happy Souvlaki Deli -- 1 drink
- Anyone refers to the Cult of Skinner -- 1 drink
- It's not a NatPacker -- 2 drinks
- Anyone kidnaps a stuffed animal -- 1 drink
- It's not a NatMare -- 2 drinks
- Anyone uses a Convenient Plot Device -- 1 drink
- Anyone admits to using a CPD -- 2 drinks
- Anyone mentions a quote list -- 1 drink
- Anything you write makes the quote list -- 2 drinks
- You are the quote list -- 3 drinks