"There may be a problem, and our tent may be intimately involved." -- Symmael to Danatha
"You give birth, and I hurl." -- Pran to Jay
*pause*
"It's tempting." -- Jay
"I don't know... You can have a homosexual fantasay about Geroge Bush... but it wouldn't be erotic." -- Jason
"That would be improper *and* really bad." -- Denyl
"Milord, how would you feel if I set you aflame?" -- Connor to Denyl
"I would hate to see your body marred by an oaken shaft." -- Denyl to
Danatha, referring to a threat of impalement from Quiso
"Has your physique changed drastically since last we...?" -- Danatha
"Anyone who's that devoted to the goddess of worthless, pitiful people has to be into cuddle-time." -- Jay
"Stick your finger in Cthulu? ... you can actually get it pretty far up there. Cool, huh?" -- Mer
Denyl: "You once said you could set me aflame?"
Connor: "Aye."
Denyl: "Could you do the same to a house?"
Connor: "Nay, my lord. Just you."
"... prehensile butt cheeks?" -- Gary
"There is a little known aspect to Agrik... the Sad Clown." --Joe
Jen: "Dan - go down and whoever's ringing our buzzer - kill them."
Jen: "Perception: a four and a four."
Marc: "You see dick."
Jen: "I figured as much. *rolls again* *rolls well*
"But whose dick is it?"
Mykkel (to a recalcitrant spirit): "I did this last night with one of your associates."
Mykkel: "I can kill you if I know it's coming."
Kirga: "It's always coming."
Demon (slapping Kirga across the room): "If she breaks, she was not
strong enough."
Kirga (wiping blood from her mouth): "Well - there is that."
Kirga: "If you come with us, I have to sleep with *that*."
Connor: "Let me grab my stuff!"
NPC: "The last sex I had was with a Laranian knight."
Azeryan: "Male or female?"
NPC: "Does it matter?"
Jen: "Battlefield rape hardly counts."
An illustration of character/player chasm: First reactions to the City
of Brass....
Mer: "Where's the cleansing nuclear fire?"
Azeryan: "It is as I always imagined heaven to be."
GM: "If she puts up too much of a fight the Agrikan soldiers will beat
her and hold her down for you."
Mer: "Wow. That's service for your silver."
Marc on raiding female slaves from the fields of Valen: "That's what you call a deep penetration raid."
Deke: "Is this Peonian bullshit - or does she have a point?"
GM: "Who the hell knows? River of Blood, Burning Sea, City of Brass,
Plain of Tears. You haven't seen the bolash yet - but they're coming."
Mer: "Yeah. You *could* have unseen wounds."
Kukshin Seneschal: "You've come to the right place."
Jen: "Well, yeah. It's the City of Agrik. What could be righter?"
Mer/Azeryan: "My sword - I'm going to call it the ugly stick and say I used to be into self-flagellation but now I just want to hurt everyone else."
Mykkel: "I'll start the bidding at a weapon of power."
GM: "He offers you a horn of plenty and unzips his pants."
Jen/Kirga: "I just love the thought of me being Azeryan's bodyguard."
Mer/Azeryan: "That's why we're elevating you to the priesthood -
you're
just so ridiculous this way."
NPC: "How much silver?"
Symael: "Well, let's see. I figure in the City of Brass scrawny white boy goes for oh - a couple of hundred."
NPC: "We'll be keeping an eye on you."
Symael: "Everyone does - I'm beautiful"
NPC: "That can be fixed."
Symael: "What exactly is it you [innkeep] want me for?"
Mer: "Your lack of chest hair."
Symael: "I don't mind doing my bit for the party - I just mind being the
party's bitch."
Deke: "OK - we won't sell you."
Symael: "Or rent me."
Deke: "We won't rent you if you won't like it."
Symael: "*I* decide whether I'll like it."
Mer: "The good thing is, if we get out of this alive we'll all speak
Surikal fluently."
Jen: "It's like foreign language camp!"
Mykkel: "I keep an eye out over my shoulder for the inevitable mugger."
GM: "You see him. He sees you see him. He says, oh, ok, guess I'll
take
the next guy then."
Symael: "Let's see if I can suddenly, spontaneously pray to Savek Nor for deliverance. (Rolls). That's a no."
Mer: "You sleep with them and I'll stand over them with a sword."
Azeryan: "If I get in bed with the Morgathian church, they'll run screaming."
Jen: "So what can I do with 3 points of sewing?"
Jason: "If you sat down and practiced for a week or two you could go
to work as a seamstress."
Mer: "Assuming the sex business ever dries up."
Shade: Do they look like Laranian knights?
Marc: Oh, yeah. They're in full regalia.
Jason: And there's the tell-tale absence of laugh-lines.
Marc: He's a consummate lady's man... and when I say "consummate..."
Jay: Every time I try to pay attention to the game, something like this
happens.
Marc: Roll your intelligence.
Jen: I can't! I have no dice-- I temporarily have no intelligence!
Jen: (rolling three 1's and two 2's): I have a full house of suckiness.
Save K'norian Guard: (grandiosely): Do you petition to enter the
Chamber of Council of Save K'nor?
Chandos: (sourly) Apparently.
Yvail: A Laranian Knight with something on his mind...
Chandos: It's an unfamiliar feeling, and I'm not sure how to deal with
it.
Marc: So-- Koris is standing there, waiting for you to tell him
something earth-shattering.
Jen: So you tell him a Lesbian incest joke, involving a rubber crank
and lemon juice.
Marc: Koris' world shatters.
Guard, to a profusely bleeding Syrana, attempting to arrest her: "You have
broken the King's peace!"
Syrana: "No! They have broken the King's peace... and they have broken
me."