>Love, Sex and all that stuff
>How do you know if you're in love, in lust, or really
>married?
>
>LOVE - When your eyes meet across a crowded room.
>LUST - When your tongues meet across a crowded room.
>MARRIAGE - When you lose your child in crowded room.
>LOVE - When intercourse is called "making love."
>LUST - When intercourse is called "screwing."
>MARRIAGE - What the hell are you talking about?
>
>LOVE - When you argue over how many children to have.
>LUST - When you argue over who gets the wet spot.
>MARRIAGE - When you argue over money.
>LOVE - When you share everything you own.
>LUST - When you steal everything they own.
>MARRIAGE - When the bank owns everything.
>
>LOVE - When it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
>LUST - When the relationship is over if you don't climax.
>MARRIAGE - What's a climax?
>LOVE - When you phone each other just to say, "Hi."
>LUST - When you phone each other to pick a hotel room.
>MARRIAGE - When you phone each other to bitch.
>LOVE - When you write poems about your partner.
>LUST - When all you write is your phone number.
>MARRIAGE - When all you write is checks.
>
>LOVE - When you show concern for your partner's feelings.
>LUST - When you couldn't give a shit.
>MARRIAGE - When your only concern is what's on TV.
>LOVE - When your farewell is "I love you, darling..."
>LUST - When your farewell is "So, same time next week..."
>MARRIAGE - When your farewell is a relief.
>LOVE - When you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
>LUST - When you only see each other naked.
>MARRIAGE - When you never see each other awake.
>LOVE - When your heart flutters everytime you see them.
>LUST - When your groin twitches everytime you see them. MARRIAGE - When
>your wallet empties everytime you see them.
>LOVE - When nobody else matters.
>LUST - When nobody else knows.
>MARRIAGE - When everybody else matters and you don't care who knows.
>LOVE - When all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
>LUST - When the song on the radio determines how you do it.
>MARRIAGE - When you listen to talk radio.
>LOVE - When breaking up is something you try not to think about.
>LUST - When staying together is something you try not to think about.
>MARRIAGE - When just getting through today is your only thought.
>LOVE - When you're only interested in doing things with your partner.
>LUST - When you're only interested in doing things TO
>your partner.
>MARRIAGE - When you're only interested in your golf
>score.