March 25, 2004
Fun With Anagrams

Woohoo! Anagrams!


March 23, 2004
Come cheer up my lads, tis to glory we steer

So I finally went ahead and did it. I bought a CD of sea songs from Jack Aubrey's navy. Roast Beef of Old England collects more than 24 old sailor's songs, including "Spanish Ladies", and "Heart of Oak", from which I draw my title.

I made it to my second Michigan basketball game as a student on Monday night. The guy behind us didn't have a grasp on what we engineers call "counting". After the first free throw was made, he'd say things like, "All right, now all we need is three more" or "We just need him to make the next two". Then there was the guy who yelled at our team "YOU CAN'T JUST STAND THERE LIKE THAT!" when we were up by eight with 2.5 minutes left. He reminded me of Krusty when he bet on the Washington Generals. "He's just holding out the ball, take it!"

I hate Ohio State, it's a know-nothing party school.


March 16, 2004
NIT, Baby!

So Michigan loses out on an NCAA bid, but that means I actually get to attend postseason basketball at Crisler, which is fine by me. A Michigan-Mizzou tournament matchup would have been tremendous, according to the preseason hype, but the Tigers didn't meet expectations and Michigan didn't reach quite as far as people thought they could. But none of that matters at gametime.

Through the end of the first half, Michigan had the edge on the scoreboard, but Missouri had been getting good looks. After being down by 9, they went on a 20-3 run to go up by eight. Michigan chased hard throughout the half, and the shots finally started to fall again and they began to catch up.

Up by one in the last minute, Daniel Horton drove through three defenders to put the ball in the hoop with 11 seconds remaining, putting the Wolverines up for good. He twisted his ankle badly coming down, but he dragged himself off floor and willed himself down the court on one leg to flip a loose ball to Bernard Robinson. It took some time after the ensuing whistle before he could even get back up to walk off the court, but he did it to a thunderous ovation. Michigan won the game by a single point when all Missouri could get on their final possession was a layup.


March 14, 2004
Past Performance Does Not Guarantee Future Performance

It's good that there's no such thing as a hockey overdose, otherwise I'd be feeling a bit poorly after this weekend. Three Michigan hockey games in three days is a great weekend, especially if they win.

On Friday, I took my dad to his first game at Yost since the building opened as a hockey arena for the 1973-1974 season. The team came out playing uninspired hockey en route to a 2-0 victory over league doormats Nebraska-Omaha. The Mavericks were especially good at jumping in front of Michigan's shots from the perimeter and clogging up the ice in front of netminder Chris Holt.

That sort of play continued, on both sides, through the game on Saturday. The Mavericks were jumping all over every puck in sight and the Wolverines couldn't find a shot that would go in. Nebraska-Omaha got a trio of goals off of Al Montoya, while Michigan couldn't slip anything past Holt after their first goal.

The third period of Sunday's hockey game was almost good enough to make me forget the eight mediocre periods preceding it. The Wolverines entered the period down 2-1 to the University of Nebraska - Omaha Mavericks, the worst team in the CCHA, tied at 1-1 in their best of three series. In the same position on Saturday, Michigan had been unable to score and gave up a breakaway goal to lose 3-1. This time, everyone in Yost Arena turned it up to 11. The band was on fire during the intermission, and kept cranking out songs with crowd involvement. In the stands, everyone kept up the energy with chants and cheers. Finally, seven minutes into the period, Dwight Helminen took Mike Brown's rebound off the post and banged it home, and Yost erupted. One minute later, before the goal cheer was over, Eric Werner put back another rebound for the game winning goal. Less than two minutes later, Jeff Tambellini notched an insurance tally to put the Wolverines up 4-2, only the second Michigan powerplay goal of the series on 22 attempts. Near the end of regulation, Helminen added an empty net goal to make it 5-2. After the clock wound down, everyone hung around as the band played, chanting "Thank you, seniors" as the team left the ice.

Of course, not everything this weekend revolved around hockey. On Saturday, we held a high school quiz bowl tournament to determine the NAQT state champion. Catholic Central made a great playoff run to take the title (again). It had looked like Troy might run away with the trophy, but they lost in the finals to CC. Best part: The tournament was over early.

Sunday evening was more than a little crazy in Ann Arbor. As I was driving down Plymouth Road, the first anomaly was the road sign warning of a curve ahead that had blown over, causing me to detour briefly into the (empty) lane for opposing traffic as I approached the Broadway bridge. On the bridge, a tarp blew over the construction barrier and flopped into a heap in front of my car. So I had a choice to make: Either attempt to run the two foot tall heap over, or get out and manhandle the thing back over the New Jersey barriers against the 20 mph+ winds. Being the reasonable sort, I chose the latter, as traffic backed up behind me. After turning down Fifth, I then had to avoid a set of trash cans that had blown over. That was better than the two crazy people who had tried to turn into oncoming traffic on Fifth and Division before and after the Saturday hockey game, respectively.

Alias this week was pretty awesome. Ricky Gervais made an appearance as a bomber and Jennifer Garner can work a red wig and nose ring like no one else on earth. Plus, the pseuodoscience was unobstrusive, just like it should be. They even displayed competence to a rare degree and managed to capture a certain pivotal Covenant figure. Of course, that means that there will be an escape within the first five minutes of next Sunday's episode, but that's just TV for you.

Maybe I'm a sucker for talking monkey statues, but I think that Wonderfalls shows a lot of promise for a pilot. Of course, it's so quirky that Fox will pull it off the air before it ever finds its stride, but it's nice to dream. Some of the gags were just too brilliant. After a smooshed-faced wax lion starts talking to her, Jaye (Caroline Dhavernas) receives a call from her mother. Assistant Manager / mouth breather Alec hands her the phone, reminding her that she only gets two minutes for personal calls and starts his stopwatch. Jaye says, "Hello mom," and sinks to the floor. Alec considers his options for a moment and shuts off his stopwatch.


March 7, 2004
When Dropping Science, Make Sure It's Actually Science

Tonight's episode of Alias was both great and terrible. Lots of the details of the episode grated, but the overall concept was sound. It's like the writers from Tru Calling invaded. The script needed a rewrite to support the central story better and needed to have some scenes trimmed. Examples:


Aubrey-Maturin '04:  The '04 is 1804

March 5, 2004
Patrick O'Brian vs. Tom Clancy

I'm reading Dean King's biography of Patrick O'Brian now, and it recounts a review that O'Brian was asked to write for the Washington Post of Tom Clancy's latest novel, The Sum of All Fears. I like to remember it as "The One Where Jack Ryan's World Becomes Incompatible With My Own Due To A Nuclear Event".

To quote King's paraphrasing of O'Brian,

He was impressed by Clancy's skill recounting a series of complex events . . . [b]ut he was disappointed in Clancy's inability to effectively inhabit his characters and make them come alive. . . . O'Brian admired Clancy's descriptive powers, just as he admired [C.S.] Forester's, but, he wrote, when Clancy "deals with his people from within it seems to me that he is out of his element, that he labors too hard, that he becomes verbose."

I think this is the definitive statement on Tom Clancy. He weaves a masterful plot in his best works, but you don't really know any of the characters. He comes close on several occasions (Marko Ramius, John Clark, Misha Filitov (AKA CARDINAL), and Jack Ryan himself spring to mind), but the others spend their time as cogs in the plot machinery. And don't get me started on how he can never write a convincing woman who isn't Mary Pat Foley.


February 13-29, 2004
Leap Day

Lots of stuff to get through, here we go . . .

Oscars, featuring my LOTR-fueled bitterness (Feb. 29)
Welcome to the Conventional Wisdom Festival, where we brook no upsets! OK, so it would be weird if LOTR had lost costumes, but the art direction on Master & Commander was surpassingly beautiful and non-CGI-based. So far the biggest surprise is Sting playing the hurdy-gurdy. (9:00)

Woohoo! Master & Commander wins for Sound Editing! It's not exactly unexpected, especially since LOTR wasn't nominated in this category, but I would have been hugely disappointed if it didn't win. Sound is so crucial to the battle sequences in the movie that if it hadn't been recognized, it would have been quite a snub. (10:35)

Errol Morris swerves close to Michael Moore territory in his acceptance speech, but pulls back from the brink. Billy Crystal then handles the moment deftly and puts it all back on track. (10:50)

"Academy Award Winner Phil Collins" just sounds so wrong. LOTR wins again, this time for best score. I guess if you just keep throwing three themes around a giant trilogy they'll give you an Oscar. (10:58)

Just when you thought it couldn't get any more boring, LOTR wins again, for editing. Then again for several other things, culminating in a win for the lame song "Into the West". I was so on board for "You Will Be My Ain True Love" from Cold Mountain, and I would have been happy for "Belleville Rendez-Vous" (which was the best performance from tonight), but "Into the West" wasn't really all that good. (11:22)

Ha! Master & Commander takes home Cinematography. As it should. (11:24)

Yeah! Sofia Coppola gets an Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. Lost In Translation will not go home empty-handed. (11:38)

Sean Penn wins for his ACTING! in Mystic River over Bill Murray's acting in Lost In Translation. Some things in life just aren't fair. (12:00)

LOTR wins Best Picture. Well, duh. So they don't lose a single category? The 2004 Academy Awards: Just As Boring As When Titanic Won All Those Oscars, Just This Time The Movie Is Better. It seems like this year the Academy realized that they forgot to give out enough statuettes to Fellowship of the Rings and The Two Towers, so they just dumped as many as possible on them this year. Don't get me wrong, Return of the King is a worthy Best Picture winner, but I don't know that it was the clear-cut winner in every category for which it won. And it made for dreadfully dull TV.(12:06)

Hockey vs. Notre Dame (Feb. 27,28)
All we needed was a split on the road at Notre Dame to lock up the CCHA regular season title. Can we get it? No, of course not. Notre Dame allows three goals during the weekend, but we allow nine. Now we need to split with MSU at Munn and the Joe.

Bush Backs Amendment On Gay Marriage Ban (Feb. 25)
Seriously? We're wasting our time on an amendment to deal with gay marriage? Isn't that more of a religious issue than a constitutional one?

Yankee Or Dixie, Jack or Stephen?
I was directed to these quizzes by The Gunroom, a Patrick O'Brian e-mail list to which I subscribe. The first is a quiz to test whether you are Yankee or Dixie. Despite my answers clustering around the Great Lakes (duh) I'm still only "43% (Yankee). Barely into the Yankee category." The quiz I've put up here is stolen off of Google's crawl, as the original web page has been yanked. The other quiz is more on-topic for The Gunroom, as it asks Which Patrick O'Brian Character From "The Far Side Of The World" Are You?. I came out as Jack.

Captain Jack Aubrey

Captain Jack Aubrey ~ You find yourself in charge,
but then it is not surprising! You know this
ship better than anyone, and your instincts are
sharp for the profession. Your approach is
methodical and unique, employing tried and true
techniques and yet not afraid to take chances
against the odds in conjuring a cunning plan.
Your crew knows this, and they know you are
also a fair and just leader, and they will
fight hard under your command. They don't call
you Lucky Jack for no reason.

Which Patrick OBrian character from The Far Side Of The World are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Working (Feb. 23-27)
Instead of going on an actual spring break, I went back to work for a week. The kind people of Radar Industries even paid me overtime (120%) for my services. Now I can buy that CD-casette adapter with a clear conscience. Interestingly enough, I was the only person of six in my department not to miss any time during normal working hours (8:00 AM - 5:00 PM) during the whole week. The head of the department quit on Friday morning, my boss left early on Friday because he was sick, one guy left for a long weekend Thursday night, one guy was in a car accident Thursday morning and decided to take a sick day on Friday, one guy came in late on three different days, and one guy is a contract worker who can just leave if he doesn't have any work to do.

CBI Regionals (Feb. 21-22)
I went to Albion last weekend to read at CBI's RCT. On Friday, I felt that my voice was getting a little hoarse, and I hoped that I'd hold up through the weekend. That was wishful thinking. By lunchtime on Saturday, I was toast. I croaked my way through the rest of the day fueled by copious amounts of water and Luden's. I hoped to make some recovery during the night, but it was not to be. My voice had hit its low point late on Saturday, so I didn't do it any more damage on Sunday, but that's not much consolation to the poor, unfortunate teams for whom I was reading.

Hockey vs. Bowling Green (Feb. 20)
I feel bad for Jordan Sigalet. His defense continually gave up odd-man rushes, powerplays, and random acts of incompetence as he faced an incredible barrage of shots. Of course Michigan won, and after seeing Miami last week, it's easy to see why BG remains near the bottom of the CCHA. In other news, Al Montoya received a 10-minute misconduct penalty for mouthing off to the (incompetent) refs who allowed a goal that occurred while Montoya was being interfered with.

Henry Rollins (Feb. 15)
You know, Henry Rollins may very well be the Ryan Adams of spoken word. He cranks out new material at a furious pace, has a deep inner conviction of being right, and has a faulty sense of quality control. I saw him on Feb. 15 at the Michigan Theater. He spoke for three hours straight and many stories connected, but several flopped. Some of the political humor needed tweaking, and someone really should have been at the soundboard, but I had a lot of fun. The best story was about a gig in Japan where he came face to face with three fans who were the embodiment of the Ugly American, tossing around some Japanese kid (aka Emo Boy) and how they received their comeuppance. Bonus: Low, low prices for CDs, shirts, and DVDs. 4 CDs, 1 DVD for $30. Not bad.

Hockey vs. Miami (Feb. 13,14)
Michigan's hockey team put up two great games on the Miami Red Hawks, taking the CCHA lead from them. Friday night felt like a close game until Eric Nystrom added an insurance goal with 1:41 left in the third period to give Michigan the 4-1 win.

Saturday night was a different story. It was a wild, high-scoring game that felt like it was over at the end of the first period. Things started off badly when Miami scored 11:50 into the first period after having jumped all over Michigan offensively. They had the Wolverines reeling, but that goal almost seemed to break their momentum, and if that hadn't done it, Milan Gajic's goal a minute and a half later certainly did. Miami retook the lead 1:19 later, but three Michigan goals in the next 3:10 seemed to emphatically state that Michigan would not lose this game.


February 10, 2004
DUCKS and Drakes

"Jesus was no sissy. If he played football, you'd be slow getting up after he tackled you."
-- Jerry Falwell

How cool is this? You can find the latitude and longitude of any place in the U.S. by city or ZIP code.

See what happens?
A Tucson high school basketball player was tackled by fans rushing the court. They fractured his jaw and ruptured his carotid artery. He had a stroke as a result and is partially paralyzed.

Lost In Translation is awesome, still. If you haven't seen it yet, what are you waiting for? Anna Faris has been overlooked in her role as Kelly. She does such a great Kirsten Dunst parody. It's a high compliment to say that every time she appeared onscreen it was like fingernails on a chalkboard. Witness this exchange:

Kelly: . . . Everyone thinks I'm anorexic . . .
Band Guy: . . . I thought you were anorexic too.
Kelly: Everybody does. Everybody thinks that.
Band Guy: Yeah, 'cause you look so . . .
Kelly: Thank you! I know, but it's - I mean, I eat whatever. I have a really high metabolism.

The "Thank you!" is tossed off perfectly and the angling for the "compliment" is given the perfect hint of neediness. This movie rules.

Thanks to my teammates and DUCKS for a fun weekend of quiz bowl and quiz bowl. The marathon 18-round NAQT SCT double round-robin didn't run any later than a reasonable person would suppose and the trash tournament the next day was a heck of a lot of fun. I'm not sure if I would have traveled all that way to play it as a stand-alone tournament, but the format was innovative and fun and piggybacking it with the NAQT SCT made it more than worth my time.

The SCT itself was a bit of an endurance test, and I have to give props to the moderators and other crew who made it through the day. Eighteen rounds is not easy to get through. Most of the questions were good, but a few stood out as inferior. One question where the answer was "fields" went from obscure to incredibly easy was before "FTP". And when did we let calculation questions back into the canon? I hate those. The "Memento" tossup was a nice twisting of format, but it belongs more in a trash-only tournament than an SCT. The John Hinkley, Jr. question was an instant buzzer race. I LOVED the Jack Aubrey tossup. And I set my personal record when I buzzed after two words: "Didier Ratsiraka" led me instantly to Madagascar.

As for results, Michigan A dominated, Chicago A dominated everyone else, Michigan B (my team) finished ahead of Illinois and Indiana due to tiebreakers. Michigan D finished fourth in Division II, so they're on the bubble in regard to ICT.

The format of the trash tournament was a very interesting concept. Twenty-four tossup questions per round, but teams were cleft in twain and each half of the team played a different set of questions. So in Round 9 you could send two players over to "Sitcoms" while the other two played "Nintendo" and both squads would be taking on players from Indiana. Then the points for each half-team would be added together to determine the winner. So when half our team ended up 100-65 and the other loses 0-40 we lose the game 100-105.

I wonder how it all would have ended up if the format was tweaked just a bit. Say you earned a point for each half-game won and a bonus half point or whole point for winning both. That might have changed the final standings. I can't say for sure what would have happened to everyone else, but I think my team would have jumped up in the standings. It's just another illustration of how the format influences the results. It's not like we really deserve it or anything, but it's the way things would end up.


February 5, 2004
We Give Balloons To Children

A 17-year-old high school senior in Georgia is trying to get credit for a work/study job as a demurely-clad hostess at Hooters, according to this story.

But wait, there's more! Her dad doesn't mind, and has this to say: "I went to Hooters for an hour, and six families came in for supper during that time. This is a chain restaurant with high standards." Clearly, because six families in Georgia entered this establishment, it has a high moral tone.

The manager is also participating in Hooters' image realignment, reporting that they try to make it a "fun place for everyone" and "We give balloons to children; we have a kids' menu". Yes, I'm sure that will distract everyone from the gratuitous T&A. Whee, balloons!

The article also mentions that other students have worked at the restaurant at non-work/study jobs on weekends and summers and some students who are on work/study have jobs at restaurants where alcohol is served. I think the point has been missed.


February 2, 2004
Original Definition of "Google" Abandoned
Really Big Number To Be Renamed "Nilknarf"

I was sent this link today from a certain quarter. It's an article about former QB-type guy Joe Janes and the class he's teaching at the University of Washington about Google and modern society. The article itself is pretty interesting, but what caught my attention was the lead:

Anyone who knows anything about the Internet knows that "Google" doesn't mean the number one followed by 100 zeros

In a word: no. In several words, anyone who knows anything about numbers knows that of course "Google" still means 10^100. Stupid sloppy writing, deflecting me from the main thrust of the article. It sounds like someone waiting until the last minute before a deadline, looking for a cheap hook to use in the lead. And people wonder why newspaper readership is in decline. Do editors still exist?

Cyborg TUNGSTEN!
Before watching the Super Bowl yesterday, we watched America defend its poker dominance on NBC. The World Poker Tour Battle of Champions provided some serious poker thrills, including a couple of incredible hands made on the river. For anyone who didn't see, here's a link to the quick bio of the Finnish Poker-Playing Cyborg, aka Juha Helppi. He didn't seem to stay in a single pot until he went all-in and was sent packing, the last best hope for the Old World falling victim to the Monroe Poker Doctrine.


February 1, 2004
Chump to Champ

Today I watched Adam Vinatieri narrowly avoid being Super Bowl XXXVIII's official goat. He missed 31 and 36-yard attempts before nailing a 41-yarder with four seconds left in the game to give New England their three-point margin of victory.

Hopefully NASA Administrator Sean O'Keefe will reconsider his decision to scrap the mission to the Hubble Space Telescope. It's one of the single most valuable pieces of scientific apparatus in history, and its replacement will probably suffer from the same sort of delays that befell the Hubble.

O'Keefe doesn't want the mission on the schedule because, due to Hubble's orbit, the shuttle couldn't reach the ISS if something went wrong. I think it's worth the risk for one mission in order to prolong Hubble's lifespan for another few years until the replacement comes online.

Save The Hubble

This site is really cool. You can make a map of the US showing all the states you've visited, or go for countries of the world. State count for me: 24. Country count: 3. Clearly, the states make for a better map in this case. Also, it appears I have Kentucky surrounded.

My Visited States Map

create your own visited states map or write about it on the open travel guide


January 31, 2004
Hooray for CSS!

Welcome to my newly redesigned blog. Thanks to CSS, it no longer looks awful. I'm now taking a class in web design, so that helps with the whole "actually learning what to do" angle.


January 9, 2004
Top Ten

So it's time for every music critic to come up with a top ten list for the past year. I prefer not to restrict myself to things that actually came out in 2003, but to branch out to include every new album I purchased or received this year that was created in the last ten years. Here's my list, arranged by nationality.

Google