Session 4: June 3, 2000


Wendi Strang-Frost as GM
Lisamarie Babik as Lulu Le Beau
Kevin Collins as Baby Dewey
Kris Fazzari as Claire AKA Sylvia Darby AKA "Static"
Sean Frost as T.M. Smith, AKA "Mr. Lucky"
Andy Prill as Dirk Steel
George Rabick as Tom A. Stockton
Matthew Richardson as Naomi Reed Kline
Dave Schoen as "The Purple Avenger"
Steve Sikora - Sir/Dr. Alec Neville-Smythe
Aaron Zollweg as the peanut gallery


Madame Nicole Barbeaux, Lulu Le Beau's grandmother
Leslie Harold, Guardians of Order liaison
Ned Macabee, Lulu Le Beau's lawyer
Basil Merriwether, field scientist for the CDC


"And in today's Entertainment News: a new scandal rears its ugly head! World famous French-Canadian actress Louise Le Beau turns out to be no more French than French fries..." -- newscaster

"I've already talked to Mr. Hoover. I told him we'd cooperate with him in any way we could to help expose the fraud. Mr. Hoover's actually quite a fan of yours. I don't suppose you could part with a pair of shoes?" -- Ned
"My shoes? Whatever on earth for?" -- Lulu
"Don't ask." -- Ned

"North cold, south warm..." -- Dirk
"By that logic, you'll wind up in India..." -- GM
"So (Dirk's) not the brightest candle in the 'abra..." -- Andy

"How do you spell S.O.S. in Tibetan?" -- Dirk to the group

"You mean (Tom Stockton) might be some kind of idiot savant?" -- Alec
"Well, you're half right." -- Basil

"Shit brings the snow." -- Sean to the group, speaking for Dirk

"(Dirk's) going to wait until night to steal wait, it's winter. They won't hang their clothes out to dry... Well, he's not a genius, so he'd keep looking for them to hang their clothes out." -- Andy to GM

"I try to think myself warm, so I don't freak (the villagers) out." -- Dirk to GM

"Naked, clothed, I'm the guy with the gun." -- Sean to the group, speaking for Dirk

"You're a gymnast, so (the clothing) actually fits." -- GM
"Because I'm muscular! Ha-ha!!!" -- Dirk
"No, short." -- GM

"People tend to look at you funny." -- GM
"Is that because I'm Occidental?" -- Dirk
"The Occidental Tourist." -- Sean

"(Dirk) has to make a disguise roll to pass for living." -- Sean to the group

"Now that my career is dead, am I going to be able to hear Claire too?" -- Lulu to GM

"I went to adjust the thermostat and I was attacked by wild lightning..." -- The Purple Avenger to the group
"OK, so what really happened?" -- Kris

"Just remember, shit brings the snow." -- Andy to the group

"Get rid of her!" <pause> "Of course, if my phone is bugged, I didn't really mean it." -- Lulu to Ned

"The real Purple Avenger could take his suit off." -- Leslie
"Give me a second." <pause> "I can move my goggles." -- The Purple Avenger

"I'm the Purple Avenger, I fly!" -- The Purple Avenger
"But you don't know where you're going, do you?" -- Leslie

"We could soak (the Purple Avenger) in glue thinner (to try to remove his costume)." -- Basil to Alec
"It may not work, but it certainly will be funny." -- Sean

"Isn't there supposed to be a Tibetan monster that comes with that?" -- T.M. to GM
"Hello!" -- Dirk, waving his hand

"I don't have amnesia, I just don't know who I am." -- Claire to Basil

"I'm a ghost with amnesia, how do I know?" -- Claire to Basil

"There's going to be a foot doctor in the morgue why?" -- GM to Andy
"He's checking the toe tags." -- Kris

"And the only time (Dirk) can go unconscious is when he passes out." -- Andy to the group

"What kind of slackers are my parents hiring these days?" -- Dirk to the group
"The kind that don't answer calls from the dead." -- Sean

"I'm not going to cry." -- Baby Dewey, after Madame Barbeaux is killed
"Oh, you might. She's the one who was supposed to turn you back." -- GM

"It's the 50's, smoking is sexy." -- Lulu to the group

"I knew (my grandmother) was a bitch, I didn't know she was a witch." -- Andy to the group, speaking for Lulu

"I can breathe and piss, which is twice as much as (Dirk) can do." -- Baby Dewey to the group

"I'm too pretty to go into hiding." -- Lulu
"You're too vain to be useful. Why do you think I destroyed your career?" -- Madame Barbeaux
"Because you're a mean old bitch." -- Lulu

"Has been..." -- Baby Dewey
"Bedwetter..." -- Lulu
"So, it's to be like that then, is it?" -- Baby Dewey

"Can I fight crime yet?" -- The Purple Avenger
"Not yet. We have to wait for your brain to stop leaking." -- Alec
"Can I at least have a coloring book?" -- The Purple Avenger

"(Naomi) looks like one of those women in the magazines, only she has her clothes on." -- GM to The Purple Avenger
"I look much more like one of those women in the magazine, and I'll take my clothes off." -- Lulu

"You may call me Purple." -- The Purple Avenger to Naomi

Quotes table of contents
Session 3 quotes | Session 5 quotes

Done by Kris Fazzari.

Last modified on June 9, 2000 by Kris Fazzari.