Monday I had the "honor" to try and contact the members of the family that Ahab couldn't reach. Actually it's not so much that Ahab couldn't reach them, but that he didn't try. He has been awfully busy lately, but he treated me like a servant, which I'm not going to take from him. The next time he pulls rank on me, m'fist's gonna have to have a talk with him. It didn't take long, as I didn't have much to say. Most of the family was interested in Benedict's return. Combined with the fact that Eric and Corwin had stopped fighting, most of them couldn't wait to come home. I pulled Dierdre through - she had been vacationing in Rebma. She was amazingly graceful for someone who was soaked to the bone - Rebma does that to you, it does. Flora was already at home. Father was at sea, on one of Caine's ships. Thinking of Caine... he's missing. Father hasn't heard from him in days. Mental note: never ask your aunts to make themselves "available" - they never take it right. Also never tell uncles that their presence isn't important - they also tend to take that wrong. On the whole, choose your speech wisely, and although Father seems to learned it, that is a lesson I have yet to master. The meeting was later that afternoon - Benedict presided over it - whole appropriate. He does have a fine military mind. He said that there were problems in shadow, and that they were heading towards Amber. He said that it was taking the form of a black road, a black road that lay throughout shadow. It showed up maybe two days ago - about the time we were in Heather's shadow, a point that I brought up. This surprised some people, and Ahab was obliged to tell his "Primal Pattern" story again, I swear that I've heard him repeat that more times than I had to sing "God Save the Queen" in the navy. I digress. Benedict tried to follow the road to its source... he... he lost an arm. Benedict is not at all weak minded, or in the body. I shudder to think what could have done it... maybe it'll do it to Ahab. One can hope. Eric ended the meeting, calling us to arms. He didn't actually put it that way; that would have been really unwise around Benedict (in his present state.) Got to speak with Father afterwards - it's been awhile, what with that li'l trip to Heather's shadow. Months in fact. He gave me a bear hug; I guess da missed me. It's welcomes like that that make me come home. I asked about mother, and she's fine - I was worried when she ran off after I told her about the trio going to Rebma. I don't know what me or da would do if anything happened to her, neither of us takes grief very well. I asked da to go to dinner with me, but he was anxious to get back to the fleet. I wanted to go with him - I haven't sailed with him in ages - but he wouldn't have me. I'm a bit hurt by that, it's not like I don't know the trade. I think that he's worried about me - I've gotten in to some trouble lately, and I don't think that he wants it to get much beyond that. Da's back with the fleet, and I'm here in the castle. All I want to do is help. Time to look in to some dinner for m'self. Took a tray up from the kitchen for dinner - mostly sausage, cheese, and bread. No one has been eating together lately, so the kitchen staff hasn't been making anything big. People have basically been eating alone since we dedicated Corwin's tomb - which here, is months ago. These are unhappy times - there's something wrong with a family that doesn't make an attempt to eat together. Ran into Ahab on the way upstairs - he was in a great hurry. I says to him, I do, "Ahab, where are you off to in such a rush?" And he says to me, "I'm goin' to Brand's room, Felix." I almost dropped me dinner then. He's still being a bit aloof. If he wants to go to Brand's room, he's welcome to... even I'm not that stupid. Fool. Ate dinner on the battlements... it's a pretty view without all the troops, very peaceful. Just me, m' food, and the sunset - which is often enough company... especially at sea. There are still troops looking for Bleys. I think that he'd be found by now, if he weren't dead. He had a trump deck, he's probably someplace safe, resting up. I hope he doesn't stay away too long - Eric and Benedict seem to think that it was important that all of the family members were available, if possible. Just as I was finishing up, watching the sun dip below the horizon, Ahab trumps me - this is too sweet - he called to apologize. I said to him, I did "Ahab," I said, "I accept your apology." An' he said, "You fool, I didn't apologize." Maybe he didn't in some many words, but it's the closest to escape his lips in years. Perhaps Flora had a talk with him? I think that I'll go and join mother at the summer house. The season's actually begun, and I've got nothing else to do... I guess it's time to go in, it's getting dark, with the sun being set and all. I got a call in the middle of packing. It was Ahab again. He just wont leave me alone - he and I have never been close, not for my lack of trying, but as I probably said earlier, he's usually really aloof. Apparently he'd gone in search of Ariana, they'd met up, and called me for some reason. Gonna go look for Ariadne, I think, and they thought that I could help - which again, is completely unlike Ahab. He pulls me through, and there I am, sitting in the middle of Driscle, Ariana, Ahab an' some new guy. He likes black, this new guy does. He and Corwin have similar taste in color. Anyway, they'd called me in - I don't think that it was Ahab's idea - because Driscle said Ariadne's attracted to me. I'm really flattered that she finds me attractive, but our last meeting was more than a little strange. They also wanted to get Heather - they thought that she could put Ariadne's mind in order. I wouldn't trust my head to one of Clarrisa's, I'd have no way of guaranteeing that they put me thoughts back the way they was. I figure that they had a plan or something. Anyway, they must know better'n me. Driscle and this new guy - Alex, I think - went off to look for Heather. And I took this as a good time to go home, an' get meself a horse. I didn't think that any of the poor animals would be up to take me and another. This took a little while, had to find a capable mount. By the time I got back, Alex and Driscle were gone. Ahab and Ariana decided to continue looking for Ariadne. Ahab wanted to hellride - but Ariana wouldn't let go of her servants. Shadowfolk don't keep up very well during hellrides. I think Ahab might have succeeded, had he explained it in terms of sex. He said it was the ultimate rush, if he had said it was the ultimate o... I've been hanging around Ariana too much. I need to go one shore leave... SOON!! We kept looking for Ariadne, but with no avail. We still hadn't heard back from the others, and we didn't know why they wanted Ariadne, so Ahab went to look for them himself. I convinced Ariana that we could travel faster without her servants, and agreed to take them to the summer house. They should be fine here with mum. Got to go... Ariana's calling me back. I guess we're gonna keep looking for Ariadne. Ahab called me again. I don't know why... it seems to have escape my mind. He pulled Ariana and I through to Heather's, where he just seemed to be making her upset again. They do that an awful lot to each other. After surveying the situation, I decided to address Heather politely, and to her credit, she responded likewise. Aunt Flora would seem to be right about manners. People exchanged lineage again. Driscle is Random's - I wonder if he knows? Alex... Alex is from Chaos - which would appear to be the opposite extreme to Amber. Chaos want's to invade Amber. What did we do to them? That's where the road starts, it does. It's gonna span from Chaos to Amber when it's done.. This has to be stopped. Alex knows Ariadne too. I wonder if she's from Chaos? Why is this happening to me? Everyone here WANTS to trump Brands. Seems he was being held by someone. Let them I say, but everyone else seemed so intent on it. They said, "If we free Brand, we don't have to look for Ariadne anymore." I'd rather hang out with Ariadne than Brand - at least she thinks I'm cute. Driscle thinks that we can transfer Brand from the shadow he's being held in, to a shadow that we can hold him. I don't know why I keep using "we." I don't want any part of this... but I'm being pressed into service again... shit. Brand didn't answer our call... which isn't a surprise, those of us trying aren't from the most mentally adept branches of the family. Driscle got interrupted when we tried the first time - both times actually. Both times it was Heather. The second time, he and Ariana get pulled through - all the while Ahab was yelling at me to force my shield up around Driscle. It would have been as easy for Ahab to put Driscle's glasses on him. I wasn't even standing next to Driscle. Ahab is very angry with me. He just trumped out. I don't think that I have much time... zounds... I really wish I had left... Lord Brandon has returned to his manor. ...He's seen me... it's too late. The last thing I remember is trying to run away. I just had to leave. Brand was being absolutely horrible to all of us. It all went black. I woke up to Benedict and Ahab's voice. I could swear that Ahab was kicking me to wake me up - I don't have any proof, but I don't think that I imagined that. To think that Heather had to grow up with this. The poor girl - all this time. She finally found out that she was a pawn - it's part of being a child of Amber. Poor thing - I think that she thought that she was a player. I find it amazing that she's turned out as well as she has. Benedict took Driscle to another room - to yell at him. Driscle didn't look very happy when he came back. Ahab and Benedict didn't look very happy either. I can't imagine that I looked very happy either. Benedict didn't know how to handle Alex - he was surprised to see a "Chaosite." Benedict confirmed that Chaos is our enemy. I don't think that he trusts Alex. He took us all back to Amber - he's taken Alex, Ariana, Driscle, and Heather to meet Eric. Eric does need to know about any lost children of Amber. I think I'm going to stay in my room for a while. I'd prefer not to see Ahab again. I don't believe that I'm the only one at fault here, but it sure feels like it. Where's da an' his bear-hugs when you need them?