I've been spending more time with Mum - she's gone through so much
lately.  I feel bad for her, I really do.  She'd come so close to loosing
Da an' me, it's put a great strain on her.  It's been
nice...comforting...and we could all use some comfort about now.  Flora's
been spending a great deal of time with Ahab's family.  It's horrible
what's happened to Ahab and Gramble, but it's good that Kimdyl and Flora
have each other to turn to, and I hope that we are one day able to repay
Zane for all the grief and pain he has caused my family.

	The scope of Ariana's healing magics has broadened significantly. 
She was able to determine Brendan's father magically.

	It's not me.

	I guess I should be relieved.  I didn't want another child just
now - especially from a woman that I barely know.  I ask myself, what kind
of father will a vampire make?  It's unfair.  That is, it's unfair of me
to assume that Shard won't make a good father; we were friends once, I owe
him the benefit of the doubt.  I spoke to him briefly about it, he has his
doubts as well.  I will be there for Bridget and Brendan should they need
me, but the child is Shard's.  He should have the opportunity to know his
father, I won't take that away from Shard (nor do I wish to).

	I spoke to Eric about Bridget's situation.  He was extremely
surprised to find out that Shard was "dead" - apparently no one in the
royal family felt the need to inform the Regent of this.  I tried to
explain things, but I'm afraid that I didn't do a very good job of it.  He
suggested that I have Fiona "speak" to Bridget about Shard.  It seemed
like a good idea at the time (she is probably the most moody,
foul-tempered, and right out scary pregnant woman I have ever met).  I
took Laughter along, just in case; I was hoping that she would help
explain, but she didn't speak up.  Again, I don't think I explained things
quite as well as I could have.  By the time I left, I felt extremely
nervous.  I talked to Shard about it later that night.  He said that
Fiona's services would be unnecessary.  "I've me own way with women, I
do," he says.  And I believe him.  I hope he is able to get Bridget not to
be afraid without making her love him - I don't think either of them want
that.  I hope things work out between them, but I will be around should
Brendan or his mother need me.

	I was going to write a note to Fiona thanking her and telling her
that we didn't need her to talk to Bridget after all.  Everyone thinks
that the note I had started to write would have gotten me killed.  I'll
have to take their word on it; it seemed OK to me.  I ran it by Mum, she
helped me rewrite it.  I hope that it isn't too obvious that Mum wrote it
- it'd make me feel even more stupid.  I hope that Fiona at least likes
the chocolate.

	Laughter and I also talked to Mum about her pregnancy; that went a
lot better than I would have imagined - partly because Da wasn't around,
I'm sure.  Laughter couldn't bring herself to say it, and I could only
barely.  Driscoll's irresponsibility still pisses me off.  Mum took it
well - she blames neither Laughter nor the child, which is the important
part.  She also offered to have talks with Driscoll and Foster, should
they ever act up.

	I should have kicked Driscoll's ass.

	His dragon almost killed Foster - the damn thing gutted my boy. 
That little adventure pushed Laughter into premature labor.  Luckily,
she'd spend her Shadow up, and she was only two or so weeks ahead of
schedule, but still.  Foster's going to be a long time overcoming his fear
of dragons.  I pulled Da through to work on Foster while I delivered
Driscoll's child.

	...Driscoll's child...

	It's not Pax's fault.  I'm going to have to remind myself of that
constantly.  I cannot be grandfather to Harry and Iseult and not their
brother.  I think it would hurt Laughter, it would confuse Harry and
Iseult, and probably hurt Pax's feelings.  I do not, however, wish to
share Harry and Iseult with Random and Vialle.  Maybe this will change. 
Who knows?  I do know that Driscoll picked the wrong branch of the family
to piss off.

	I got to have breakfast in Middlecourt...not exactly the ideal way
to start a day.  Seems that while Mandor's troops were trying to secure
the Shadows surrounding the new kingdom, they stumbled across a misplaced
cousin.  I guess we should be happy to get him all in one piece.  He was
kind of rude.  I, too, would be upset if my entire world view was
shattered, but it wasn't my fault that he was left in Shadow - I tried to
follow up on my potential bastards.  And I very much doubt that the men on
his world don't leave bastards in their wake.  Ariana was able to
determine that he's Eric's.  We left them alone together.  I hope that my
initial impression was wrong.

<- Back to the Diary list