Farad and Duncan can fight all they want about the stupid ring
that Dad gave them.  It's not important who has it as long as someone has
it, and that someone is willing to help me, because when I get to the end
of this road that's all sticky and black and have defeated the creatures
there, I'm going to take over and be queen, and THEN we'll see who
backhands me into a wall or whatever, because I will have the whole army
of those icky creatures to command.

	It could happen.  I wonder how I'm actually going to do it.  Those
spells of Farad's could come in handy, but I can't do them.  It would be
keen to have some talent that would just turn the tide in every conflict,
but except for the fact that my wounds always heal super-fast, there isn't
much.  Sucks to be fifteen years old in a land where everyone else has two
or three centuries (or five or six or even a couple of millennia) on you. 
I mean, I've been out and about in Shadow, but that was for *a* year.  I
don't know all the tricks and traps, and I don't know how to use people
well enough, and I don't know how to make use of the powers that I do
have.

	I'd be a very good queen, of course, if people would back me.  I'm
nice and I'm fair, but I don't have any problem with killing people, and
that seems to be the best way to be when you are a monarch.  Geez...  I
guess life just sucks sometime.  I mean, I'm sure power will come to me
sometime, but probably not real soon, and now is when I would like it.  I
have to have *SOMETHING* to do with my time, you know.  It's been good
being able to help Corwin and Dad with moving their troops, and I'm very
proud that they chose me to help Duncan with this Black Road thing, but
eventually this war will be over, and there I'll be again, twiddling my
thumbs and wondering what to do next.  I could do that lame-o thing where
I ride into Shadow and become queen of some Shadow place, but that's for
losers who can't have real power, or at least folks who don't *want* real
power, and trust me, that's not me.  It's not a matter of "I want to have
my own way all the time,"  it's more a matter of "I want people to
*behave!*"  To make people treat each other nice and to co-operate, and
make sure the subjects don't starve and that taxes aren't too high.  The
regular subjects don't stand a chance next to the assholes like Corwin and
Eric and Julian and yeah, even Dad.  Even though I won't be queen of
Amber, if I were queen of some other place, some place that makes Amber
sit up and take notice -- a place that can make a black road, for example,
I could exert my influence and go on cool ambassadorial missions, and not
live a life of futility and Shadow-walking and watching idiots do idiotic
things, helpless to interfere.  It would be nice, if I were queen.