The man is insufferable, arrogant, and far too smug. And I am
glad to have him back, all the same. Although, there was a moment or two
along the way... I still cannot believe how easy it was to capture him.
The him from this time, I mean. I suppose most everyone was distracted by
the show, of course. I must admit, it was probably the best place to
capture him from. Not that I intend to share this with Kaedric, of
course. That would only make him more smug than he already is.
I just do not understand him, sometimes. I do not see how simply
spending some time in frivolous Shadows could have brought about the
change in his personality that took place between now and when I met him.
How can any time spent in Shadow have that affect? Of course you can find
a Shadow where your every wish is fulfilled, but it is not real. And even
if it could have changed him, what prompted him to seek out those Shadows
in the first place? It must have been more than a whim. Some day, I
shall learn the answer to that. But tonight it is not important.
The question is, what do we do now? I need to fortify Chantille
Vale, but then? I am still undecided. There is still Father to deal
with, of course. If I do not find him, he will eventually find me. I am
not terribly concerned about explaining my abilities to him, since I have
no intention of explaining them at all. Kaedric, however, is another
story entirely. I suppose I can simply hope that Father will not learn of
our relationship. After all, unless he spies on my bedchamber, there is
no reason he should suspect. I can almost believe that. But then, if
Claudio's diary is to be believed, he noticed the very next morning that
things had changed between us, and if he could notice, then surely Father
will, if he ever sees us together. Well, there is nothing I can do about
it, other than hide for the rest of my life, or love Kaedric no longer.
Seeing as how I am not willing to do the one, and unable to do the other,
I will simply have to be prepared to fight Father, if need be. I have
lost Kaedric once already. I will not lose him again without a struggle.
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