Time for a change of pace. This last trial, here in waterworld,
threatens to upset my acceptance of my fate. This must not happen. I
must acknowledge and accept my fate, even if I choose not to go
peacefully. My success in this last trial will not change my fate, and
the trouble caused by my success is not, I think, worth an easier death.
I think I will force the issue.
Corwin as my father is still an unsettling thought. Granted, he
dealt handily with the Pack, back when he came into the Wilde to find Sky.
Yet, he was later tied to Claudio, in a position that still makes me
laugh. Apparently competent in some areas, yet an idiot in others. He
also seems to have a reputation as a great lover. This once confused me
above all other things I heard about him, but my time here in Rebma has
taught me nothing, if not that these people have strange customs. Perhaps
here, his idiocy is attractive.
Some things I truly have no wish to learn. His contacting me,
however, seems to say that he wishes something of me. I don't know what
that may be, but in this I might use it to my advantage. Perhaps he will
accomplish those things that my death will not allow. Being a Prince of
Amber, he may have enough influence to do what I cannot. I will see
whether having him think he is my father is a good thing or not.
For other matters, I think Benedict may be the best choice...
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