We also made sure of the bonds on Bob/Random. I should note that it was Merlin's idea to make the relase phrase "magic word." He finds it strangely hilarious.
I suppose it was foolish to think that our plan would go along so smoothly, that Random would regain his former self and the curse would be broken... that all of those family members that we'd met and interacted with would be able to come out of their hiding spots in the Shadows and return to this decimated land, and together we would all be able to restore this place to its rightful standing in the universe.
Instead, we stood around the outer ring of the Pattern, watching in shock as Random pulled around the outside of his loop of the circuit, handed the Jewel of Judgement to Shen, and then vaporized, falling forward into a shower of sparks and flame.
There was the horrid smell of burning flesh, as well as something else I could not place, and that was the end of Random.
It is hard to explain how I or the others feel at his passing. We knew him only for a short amount of time, and on a few of those occasions his personality was something other than we'd known him as. Greyson... "Bob"... I don't think it's a profound sense of losing the man that hurts, but the loss of our hope.
What is left now? Our group, Matthias, Gerard... not a lot, as Amber has been raped and pillaged time and again, but it is something. We survived the Pattern -- I suppose it is possible that Merlin and Luke and the others who are children of the cursed can complete the Pattern, but all bets are off now. We have lost so much, and there's a lot of work to come...
When I looked up, I saw Shen at the center of the Pattern, and then with little warning or fanfare, he was gone. I sighed and trudged up the stairwell, hoping that our tall friend would be at the top. He was not.
*****
The events in the basement stained my mood for the rest of that day. I went to tell Syrana about what had happened to Random, but I don't think she quite felt the hopelessness that I or the rest of us did. A person should never have to witness the loss of a human life -- let alone the horrendous way in which Random just... ceased to exist.
I was able to plan for investigating what was left of the town with her, but that would wait until tomorrow; I was in little mood to play the bard tonight, and I think she sensed my melancholy. I bid her good night with just a squeeze to the arm.
The realization finally hit me that I hadn't eaten in quite some time, and I had a plan to throw off the rest of the fugue from walking the Pattern by gorging myself and entering a great healing sleep, so I headed down to the kitchens, where I found one Cecily Greyfalcon, grumbling at a plate of food. Much like myself, she was bothered by Random's death and that was combined about the frustrations our group had found here multiplied by her brother still stranded out in Shadow with Salome. I tried to lighten her spirits a bit, but Cecily is not easily amused, so I began the first phase of an attempt to push her and Matthias in the right direction.
I have a feeling she may have thought I was hitting on her.
Eventually, she left me her plate of food, preferring a bottle of liquid nourishment to take with her to the battlements, and it was not long afterwards that -- speak of the devil -- Matthias showed up. I was quick to hurry him up to the battlements, as if he could avoid her right cross, she'd be ripe for the picking. Sure, my conscience *tsked* at me, but for the first time that day I felt better.
*****
Fletcher has left, and regardless of the spin I'd put on his little news, I had to admit that it frustrated me, because there's too many ways this information about Gerda could go horribly wrong. I have no idea if one knows about how the other feels, but if that was all to come out into the open, outright aggression and/or warfare could result.
Gerda certainly keeps this information well hidden inside; of course, given Fletcher's track record, I wouldn't be surprised if he was lying outright. The poor man just doesn't seem to be able to accept the fact the the object of his affections sees him in a slightly more than unsavory light. Truth or not, this information complicates things, and it may be best to just plead ignorance until or if this all comes out in the wash.
Some manly part of me just can't help but to be proud at my ability to charm 'em, though.
Back to There She Goes
Ahead to In the Blood
Return to Diaries
Return to Griffin