| Summer '98 Season (3-4) | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Result | Opponent | Score | CAS for | CAS ag | Gate | Winnings | Notes |
| L | Skaven Scurvy | 0-4 | 3(1) | 7(3) | 109,000 | 60,000 | Many deaths. Almost all on our team. |
| L | The Crushers | 1-2 | 0 | 3 | 51,000 | 30,000 | A recovery game, both of our Ogres sat out nearly the entire game. |
| L | Arborland Highlords | 0-5 | 2 | 1 | 159,000 | 90,000 | Oddly, another recovery game. We are nearly back in fighting trim, now, with the retirement of Newbie to coach our five rookie players, we are having a couple games of building. The Highlords didn't do much damage, except to our pride. We will meet them again, though, should all go well. |
| W | Right Nancy Boyz | 2-0 | 4(1) | 0 | 50,000 | 30,000 | It was a more brutal game than expected, most likely because of the relative greeness of the Orcs. |
| L | Darkland Overlords | 1-3 | 3 | 2 | 88,000 | 20,000 | We lost. What more can I say? |
| W | Chaos Eternals | 1-0 | 3 | 4(1) | 66,000 | 90,000 | Poor Gomer bought it in this game, but he bought it helping to make the only touchdown of the game possible. The Chaos coach (and undoubtedly others) was stunned by this upset, and Cute and Fuzzy Bunny was disappointed with only one casualty this game, but the human coach was heard to say that it was about time we had reasonable game. |
| W | Unnatural Selection | 2-1 | 4(2) | 0 | 53,000 | 20,000 | At last, a game where things go right again... We were consistent, and two hobgoblins paid for it with their lives. This marks the first game that Cute and Fuzzy Bunny didn't get a casualty. Other members of the team picked up the slack, though, also seriously injuring and badly hurting two Chaos Dwarves. |
| Old Seasons | |||||||
| Result | Opponent | Score | CAS for | CAS ag | Gate | Winnings | Notes |
| Chaos Cup Post-season (consolation play) (1-1) | |||||||
| W | Darkland Overlords | 1-0 | 6(1) | 0 | 90,000 | 60,000 | It was a game... Actually, it was kind of mellow as games go. The ghouls kept falling down, and the thrall who died came back as a vampire. The humans did manage to make one serious injury to a vampire stick, though... Good luck to the goblins! We've been loaned 10,000 gold pieces to buy another Ogre to strengthen our team, This reporter doesn't know who the contributor was, but I think he's expecting to get his money back. |
| L | Chaos | 0-3 | 3 | 3 | 67,000 | 50,000 | Another game that just didn't want to go our way, I think. Oh, well... Noone was too badly hurt in the game, so as they say, a game you can walk away from... |
| Spring '98 Season (2-5) | |||||||
| L | ArborLand Highlords | 0-2 | 4(2) | 5 | 101,000 | 30,000 | This game was bloody. On both sides. We killed the dirty player, though. |
| L | The Bloodtreaders | 0-6 | 1 | 4 | 41,000 | 10,000 | This was just disgusting. The three blitzes in a row when we couldn't field more than 7 players made it even more so. Three turns, three points for the other guys. |
| W | Darkland Overlords | 3-2 | 4 | 2 | 52,000 | 50,000 | A mostly wonderful and closely fought game, we pulled a win out in the end because the Overlords were falling over themselves to give us the ball in OT. We think they were just a little bit intimidated. |
| L | Chaos | 0-3 | 0 | 5 | 42,000 | 20,000 | This game was pretty much Chaos. From the first blitz the Chaos team sprang on us that levelled two blitzers for the rest of the game, this was pretty much not ours from the start. The next game *WILL* be different. |
| L | The Crushers | 1-2 | 2 | 8 | 36,000 | 50,000 | In this game the Crushers decided to live up to their name, and we couldn't hold onto the ball for long enough to score another TD. In fact, after the game we weren't sure we'd had the ball in our hands for long enough to score one TD, and send it into a punishing OT! |
| L | Skaven Scurvy | 0-3 | 3 | 6 | 81,000 | 120,000 | In our recovery game, we managed to hold the Skaven off for most of the first half but in the second half, the Skaven chased poor Bjorn all over the field. With his skill, though, he managed to avoid any kind of injury. Unfortunately, the commentators didn't recognize his value, and awarded MVPs to two linemen. |
| W | Toecheese Avengers | 2-1 | 7 | 1(1) | 34,000 | 60,000 | And in a romp (except for the lamentable death of our esteemed Lady Thrust), we walked all over the poor goblins in the first half, and worked over the trolls in the second half. We think that at full strength, the goblins could be a very interesting team to play. At least with the three trolls they have. |
| DungeonBowl Post-season (consolation play) (1-0) | |||||||
| W | Darkland Overlords | 2-1 | 1 | 0 | 54,000 | 50,000 | A well-played game, though mistakes were made on both sides. We just overpowered the Overlords. |
| Winter '98 Season (2-4) | |||||||
| L | ArborLand Elves | 0-4 | 1 | 5(1) | 88,000 | 60,000 | I think we won't go into details. It was bad. It was bloody. It was not pretty. And Touchdown Tam died. |
| L | The Crushers | 0-1 | 3(1) | 1 | 45,000 | 80,000 | Not a bad game, though Pearl smashed her hand on a dwarven fan in the crowd. The freak interception at the end of the game kept us from tying the game, though, and sending it into OT. |
| W | Skaven Scurvy | 2-0 | 3(1) | 2 | 36,000 | 70,000 | An interesting game... We managed to hold the skaven for their first shutout ever. |
| L | The Bloodtreaders | 0-1 | 4(1) | 0 | 29,000 | 20,000 | We played a good game. In fact, we blew the elves off the field. Unfortunately, we lost in big plays, and Theodore dropped the ball at the end of the first half. Overall, not our best showing, though we definitely made the dark elves tread a little blood. |
| L | Darkland Overlords | 0-1 | 1 | 1 | 52,000 | 50,000 | We really don't remember much about this game. |
| W | Plan 9 | 0-0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 20,000 | Forfeit |
| Golden Spike Tourney (1-1) | |||||||
| W | Skaven Scurvy | 3-2 | 5(1) | 1 | 31,000 | 40,000 | In this, the semi-finals of the Golden Spike Tourney, we held our own for the first half of the game, and then managed to floor as many skaven as possible in the second half (including a serious injury to the Rat Ogre), and swept the floor with the remainder in the spectacular overtime finale! |
| L | ArborLand Elves | 0-2 | 4(1) | 6(1) | 74,000 | 190,000 | In the finals of the Golden Spike Tourney, we held our own for the most part, but were unable to handle the ball in any way. The Arborland Wizard, and a lot of fouling in the second half all contributed to our loss. It is the case, however, that several of the Arborland players need to die. It's just a fact. |
| Fall '97 Season (2-3) | |||||||
| L | The Crushers | 0-1 | 0 | 2 | 13,000 | 0 | Not a single thing went right in this game. I think it was fate, or something similar. Or maybe it was just rotten luck for the humans out of the gate. We'll be up for our next game, though! (We hope...) |
| W | The BloodTreaders | 1-0 | 3(1) | 2 | 7,000 | 30,000 | All around, a reasonable game. No huge mistakes, and the big plays were kept to, well, none. Our first fouling game, and it helped far more than it hurt. |
| L | Skaven Scurvy | 2-3 | 3(3) | 1 | 12,000 | 90,000 | 3 deaths on the Skaven team, and we couldn't seem to capitalize. Abysmal luck on both sides of the ball, but the Skaven were all over it in OverTime. Gotta hate sudden death. But, Rev Speaker was heard saying after the game: "If there's any kind of game you'd love to lose, this has GOT to be it! A nice even spread of points, we hurt them a little, we didn't get hurt in return, we took home buttloads of money, and the fans are starting to come around! This was the most enjoyable loss I've ever seen!" |
| L | ArborLand Elves | 1-2 | 0 | 1 | 32,000 | 70,000 | A remarkably casualty-free game, it was characterized by the humans not being able to move the ball very well, throw, catch, or otherwise keep from falling down on key plays. Lucky we only lost by one, but the next game (against the undead) will be won for our new assistant coach, who was seriously injured in this game, and retired. |
| W | Plan 9 | 2-1 | 1(1) | 0 | 13,000 | 70,000 | No problems this game, except for a scare that almost put it in OT. But, the confusion of the undead saved us from sudden death. |