my answer is
Ruby Red Squirt. Mind you, if you put A&W Root Beer, IBC Root Beer, Coke, or Cherry Coke in front of me, it'll be gone before you blink. And sometimes nothing can posssibly fit the bill except a Big Kwencher of Kroger's Sparkling Punch. But in general, Ruby Red Squirt's the best thing going, and they advertise for the Simpsons.