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Friday, February 14, 2003

Ari's getting cute, now...
(Excepts from today's White House press briefing--remember, items in italics are quotes from the press conference; items in normal type are my comments.)
Ari: I think the report from Hans Blix this morning was very diplomatic with its bottom line being that the world has no confidence that Saddam Hussein has disarmed. And that's what this is about. As Secretary Powell just indicated, this is not about whether U-2s fly. This is not about whether Mirages fly. This is about whether Saddam Hussein's claim that he has disarmed is itself a mirage.

Did I miss something? I know that "Mirage" is the name of a French fighter jet, but has there been any talk of Mirages flying over Iraq? I wonder how long it took Ari to come up with that one.

Question: The specific reply to something the French Foreign Minister said, no one can assert today the path of war will be shorter than the path of inspections. Are you persuaded that the path of war would lead to quicker disarmament of Iraq than further inspections?

Ari: Given the fact that it's taken more than 12 years for Saddam Hussein to disarm, there's no question that if force is used, it will achieve the objective of preserving the peace far faster than the current path that we're on.

There it is--Ari says that war is the quickest path to peace. War is peace. Ignorance is strength. Bush is president.

Ari is next questioned about the missiles that can apparently go 114 miles instead of the 90 allowed. Even though Iraq disclosed this in their document, Ari says this is serious evidence that Iraq has not disarmed. He is pressed by the reporter--if Iraq destroys these missiles, wouldn't this be evidence of compliance? Ari refuses to answer this, and quickly changes the subject to the supposed missing chemical and biological weapons. There's no evidence they exist, but there's no evidence they were destroyed either. It's like that woman who's in prison in Alabama for killing the baby she never had. And it's obvious from the administration approach that even if all of Iraq were excavated to 200 feet and everything remotely suspicious were destroyed, they would still say that Saddam has failed to disarm and that his destroyed country must be destroyed in the name of peace.

And, while the administration has been doing everything possible to confuse the issue and imply an Iraq-al Qaeda link, when pressed on the issue, Ari says this:

Q: There's no link between September 11th and Saddam Hussein and Iraq -- that's still the administration's position?

MR. FLEISCHER: Sure, the President has said that.

AND, It's still administration policy to attack Iraq, no matter what the UN does:

MR. FLEISCHER: No, it just -- we've seen this before, where people try to guess what nations are going to do at the United Nations. Typically, it's American reporters trying to guess what foreign nations will do with a vote, which is something that is very important to them. And I would urge you to be very cautious and judicious in your predictions on how other nations will vote. The President has been engaged in consultations and will continue. And, as you've seen in the past, these typically have led to very fruitful results in terms of the world supporting the United States position, or at least not objecting to it.

Q But is he still holding back the -- the willing coalition if the Security Council does not act?

MR. FLEISCHER: There's no question at all that the President has said either the United Nations will disarm Saddam Hussein or a coalition of the willing -- which I think you've seen how substantial and sizeable it is, and is growing to even increasingly be -- will take that action.

Funny. I didn't know that Russian President Putin was an American reporter. He clearly said today that Russia would veto.

That's about it for today's excerpts from Ari's Lies. Tune in next week for more provocation and prevarication in pursuit of the destruction of the world, and don't forget: the letters in "Ari Fleischer" can be rearranged to form "FEAR RICH LIES" and "I RELISH FARCE," and that Ari denies it.