ARE YOU AN ARMENIAN?
Take this self scoring test and find out!
Give yourself one point for each "yes" you give to the following statements:
1. You have at least one Persian rug or crocheted tablecloth.
2. You frequently use expressions like "oef, eeh,eyaah and yalla."
3. You talk with your hands when you're on the phone.
4. You have at least one inlaid tavloo board in your closet.
5. You have philo dough, string cheese or See's candy in your freezer.
6. You think Fresno is the capital of California.
7. You get five o'clock shadow at two-thirty. (men)
8. You serve hummus and tabbouleh with your taco chips.
9. You don't buy anything unless you can get it for at least 50% off.
10. You've had electrolysis done on you're upper lip or between your eyebrows. (ladies)
11. You have at least one fruit tree and a patch of cilantro growing in your back yard.
12. You save string and toothpicks from restaurants.
13. You think a "chinook" is a shelf to display your teapots.
14. You have a crock of clarified butter under your sink.
15. You have a picture of Mt. Ararat hanging in your garage.
16. You have at least one relative with a rubbish route.
17. You have a jar of nutella in your refrigerator or a box of Uncle Ben's converted rice in your pantry.
18. You think the Star Trek Kardasians are a ancient Armenian tribe.
19. You shovel food on other people's plates when they aren't looking.
20. You think pilaf is one of the four food groups.
Super bonus points:
1. Add three points if you've had a nose job.
2. Add two points if you've ever told anyone that former California Governor George Deukmejian was a relative.
3. Add two points if you have a video tape of old "Mannix" reruns.
4. Add five points if you have a recording of Charles Aznavour.
Interpreting your score:
0-5 points: Let's face, it you're an odar.
6-10 points: You probably know a lot of Armenians or are married to one.
11-15 points: Chances are extremely high that you're Armenian.
16-20 or more: There's no doubt about it, you'll never fool anyone.
You're probably planning a trip to the old country right now.
Thank you Charis Yousefian for bringing this to my attention.